Why people in love appear "stupid" or behave irrationally

  Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "why people in love appear stupid or behave irrationally",  The reason I chose this topic is because many couples have irrational relationships when they are in a relationship, Based on my observations, the reason someone appears stupid in a relationship is because he only prioritizes passion and does not prioritize commitment and quality of intimacy, there are several psychological terms that can explain why people in love appear "stupid" or behave irrationally:

Limerence: This term was introduced by psychologist Dorothy Tennov in 1979. Limerence describes a highly obsessive state of mind when someone is in love. Characteristics of limerence include:

- Constantly focused thoughts on the loved one (limerent object).

- Intense feelings of mixed happiness and anxiety.

- Fear of rejection.

- Overinterpretation of even minor actions or words from the loved one.

- Irrational or unusual behavior in an attempt to attract attention or approach the loved one

Halo Effect: The halo effect is a cognitive bias in which a positive impression of a person in one area influences your judgment of that person in another area. In the context of falling in love, the halo effect can cause you to overlook your loved one's flaws and only see their positive aspects. This can make you appear "stupid" because you are unrealistic in your assessment of the person.

Cognitive Dissonance: Cognitive dissonance occurs when someone experiences a conflict between their beliefs and their behavior. When you fall in love with someone whose traits or behaviors conflict with your values, you may experience cognitive dissonance. To reduce this tension, you might change your beliefs or rationalize your loved one's behavior, which can make you appear "stupid" to others.

Attachment Theory: Attachment theory explains how our early relationships with caregivers influence our romantic relationship styles later in life. People with an insecure attachment style (anxious or avoidant) may exhibit irrational or excessive behavior when falling in love, such as becoming overly clingy or withdrawn from their loved ones.

Neurotransmitters: Biologically, falling in love triggers the release of neurotransmitters like dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin in the brain. Dopamine is associated with feelings of pleasure and reward, norepinephrine triggers stress responses (such as heart palpitations), and serotonin (which typically regulates mood) actually decreases during early love. This combination of chemical effects can lead to impulsive, obsessive, and less rational behavior.

Why Does This Happen?

 - Evolution: Evolutionarily, "stupid" behavior during love may have served a purpose in strengthening bonds and increasing reproductive opportunities.

- Strong Emotions: Love is a powerful emotion that can override logic and common sense.

- Desire for Connection: Humans have a fundamental need to connect and be loved. When we find someone we feel connected to, we may be willing to do unusual or irrational things to maintain the relationship.

Example:

Someone who is usually very careful with their finances may suddenly spend lavishly on gifts or lavish dates to win the heart of their loved one. Or, someone who is fiercely independent may become overly dependent on their partner and constantly seek validation.

Hope this explanation helps

A lack of love or affection can be a trigger for depression

  Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "A lack of love or affection can be a trigger for depression",  The main reason why I chose this topic is because many people don't realize how important it is to cultivate a sense of love within themselves. It's not the common cause, as depression is a complex condition influenced by many factors. However, feeling unloved or lacking a strong emotional bond can significantly impact mental health.

Here are some reasons why this can happen:

1. Feeling Worthless and Lonely

Love and affection, whether from family, friends, or a partner, give us a sense of self-worth and meaning. When we feel loved and accepted, we tend to feel more valuable. Conversely, when we feel a lack of love, we can begin to feel worthless, chronically lonely, and isolated. These negative feelings are common symptoms of depression and, if prolonged, can lead to more serious depression.

2. Increased Stress Hormones

A lack of affection can trigger increased levels of stress hormones like cortisol in the body. Sustained high cortisol levels can affect the balance of chemicals in the brain, including mood-regulating neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine. This imbalance is often linked to the development of depression.

 3. Problems in Building Healthy Relationships

Experiences of a lack of love, especially in childhood, can affect how a person builds relationships in the future. They may find it difficult to trust others, have difficulty forming healthy emotional bonds, or even withdraw from social interactions. This social isolation can ultimately exacerbate feelings of loneliness and increase the risk of depression.

Examples of the Impact of a Lack of Love on Depression

* Breakup: The loss of an important relationship can trigger deep sadness and feelings of emptiness. If these feelings are not addressed properly, they can develop into depression, characterized by symptoms such as loss of interest in activities previously enjoyed, changes in appetite or sleep, and feelings of hopelessness.

* Lack of Parental Affection: Children who do not receive enough affection and attention from their parents are at risk of developing mental health problems, including depression and anxiety. They may become more aggressive or, conversely, withdraw from social settings.

* Unhealthy Relationships: Being in a relationship full of conflict, incompatibility, or where one partner feels unappreciated or unloved can also trigger stress, anxiety, and ultimately depression.

 If you or someone you know feels persistently sad, empty, or hopeless due to a lack of love, it's crucial to seek professional help. Talking to a psychologist or psychiatrist can help you work through emotional wounds and find ways to build healthier relationship patterns.

Natural love (not forced, not merely obsession, or manipulation) usually grows from a combination of internal (self) and external (environment, interactions with others) factors. Here are some keys to creating it:

1. Start from within

✅Know yourself: when someone knows what they need, they are more honest in their relationships.

✅Self-acceptance: People who are comfortable with themselves are usually able to love others more sincerely.

✅Reducing ego: Natural love is born from giving unconditionally, not from demanding others to conform to our desires.

2. Building healthy interactions

✅Mutuality: Love grows when there is reciprocity—giving and receiving naturally.

✅Appreciating the uniqueness of others: not seeking to change, but accepting who they are.

✅Consistent small gestures: Daily caring is more powerful than occasional big words.

3. Natural factors in relationships

✅Time & togetherness: Love often emerges through regular, deep interactions.

✅Trust: A sense of security creates emotional intimacy that allows love to grow naturally.

✅ Togetherness in joy and sorrow: shared real experiences deepen the sense of connection.

4. Avoid coercion

✅Forced love (for example, through manipulation, prestige, or fear of loneliness) is usually fragile. Natural love arises from honest connection, not pressure.

To summarize:

Natural love arises when we can accept ourselves, respect others, build healthy interactions, and give space for the relationship to develop naturally.

Maintaining love can be difficult, but it's not impossible

  Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "Maintaining love can be difficult, but it's not impossible". The main reason why I chose this topic is because many young people are trapped in the wrong love, Some people choose to continue the relationship even though they have fallen into the wrong love, there are many factors that can make it difficult to maintain love, now let me explain why can maintaining love be difficult?

Here are some reasons:

* Individual Change and Development: Everyone continues to grow and change over time. Expectations, priorities, and even personalities can change, requiring constant adaptation in relationships.

* Poor Communication: Misunderstandings, assumptions, or an inability to express feelings and needs honestly and effectively can be toxic to a relationship.

* Lack of Effort and Priorities: Love requires effort. When one or both partners stop investing time, energy, and attention, love can fade.

* Routine and Boredom: Relationships that lack surprises, novelty, or enjoyable shared activities can become boring.

* External Issues: Pressures from work, finances, family, or health issues can put pressure on a relationship and drain energy that should be allocated to love.

* Differences in Values and Goals: While they may not be immediately apparent, fundamental differences in life values or long-term goals can create conflict that is difficult to resolve.

 * Lack of Intimacy and Emotional Intimacy: In addition to physical intimacy, emotional intimacy—the ability to feel safe, understood, and vulnerable with one another—is crucial. Without it, relationships can feel empty.

* Unrealistic Expectations: Sometimes, people have too high expectations of their partners or the relationship itself, which can lead to disappointment and frustration.

So, What Can Be Done?

While it can be difficult, there are many ways to maintain love and keep your relationship strong and healthy:

* Open and Honest Communication: Talk about your feelings, needs, and concerns. Listen to your partner with empathy.

* Continuous Effort: Continue to "date" with your partner, do fun things together, and show appreciation.

* Adaptability and Flexibility: Be willing to adapt to change and grow together.

* Prioritize the Relationship: Give your relationship enough time and attention, even when you're busy.

* Intimacy and Emotional Intimacy: Keep your relationship physically and emotionally intimate.

 * Healthy Conflict Resolution: Learn not to avoid conflict, but to resolve it constructively.

* Continue Learning and Growing Together: Discover new interests, face challenges together, and continue learning about each other.

Ultimately, maintaining love requires commitment, patience, and effort from both parties. It's an ongoing journey, not a final destination, Robert J. Sternberg's Triangle Theory of Love Sternberg proposed that love consists of three basic components that can be combined in various ways to form different types of love. These three components are:

1. Intimacy

* Definition: Refers to feelings of closeness, attachment, and connectedness in a relationship. It involves feelings of mutual trust, understanding, sharing secrets, and emotional support. Intimacy is the emotional aspect of love.

* Examples: Deep conversations, support during difficult times, feeling comfortable being yourself with another person.

2. Passion

* Definition: Refers to the drive that leads to romance, physical attraction, and sexual relationships. It is the motivational aspect of love that causes intense attraction.

* Examples: Physical attraction, sexual desire, intense and often sudden "falling in love."

3. Commitment

* Definition: Refers to the decision to love someone and maintain that love over the long term. This is the cognitive aspect of love, involving a conscious choice to stay together.

 * Examples: The decision to marry, the promise to remain faithful, and the effort to resolve conflicts for the sake of the relationship's continuation.

How to make someone feel loved by themselves

  Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "How to make someone feel loved by themselves", The reason I chose this topic is because not everyone feels that they are not worthy of being loved, so they just wait to be loved, for your information: helping someone feel loved by themselves, or building self-love is a deep and ongoing process. It's not about one big action, but rather a series of habits and mindset changes. Here are some ways to help someone achieve this:

1. Encourage Self-Acceptance

* Validate Their Feelings: Help them understand that all feelings, whether happy, sad, angry, or anxious, are valid. Don't let them judge themselves for feeling a certain way.

* Focus on Strengths: Encourage them to recognize and appreciate their positive qualities and strengths. Have them make a list of accomplishments or things they like about themselves.

* Encourage Positive Self-Talk: Often, the harshest critics come from within themselves. Help them shift their internal narrative from negative to more positive and supportive. This can start by recognizing negative thoughts and consciously replacing them with affirmations.

* Embrace Imperfection: Remind them that no one is perfect. Mistakes and shortcomings are part of being human. Help them see flaws as areas for growth, not as reasons to hate themselves.

 2. Helping with Self-Care

* The Importance of Physical Well-Being: Encourage them to prioritize adequate sleep, balanced nutrition, and physical activity. Taking care of their body is a tangible form of self-respect.

* Time for Fun: Encourage them to make time for hobbies or activities they enjoy, which bring them joy and relaxation.

* Healthy Boundaries: Help them learn to say "no" when necessary, and set healthy boundaries in relationships and work. This protects their energy and well-being.

3. Developing Self-Awareness

* Mindfulness and Meditation: These practices can help them become more present in the moment, observing thoughts and feelings without judgment. This is an important step in understanding themselves.

* Journaling: Encouraging them to journal can be a great way to explore their emotions, thought patterns, and experiences, and gain insight into themselves.

* Seeking Professional Help (If Needed): If their struggles are too overwhelming, suggest talking to a therapist or counselor. Professionals can provide specific tools and strategies for building self-love and addressing deep-seated issues.

 4. Building Healthy Relationships

* Positive Social Circle: Encourage them to surround themselves with people who support, appreciate, and uplift them, not those who put them down or drain their energy.

* Reducing Social Comparison: Help them understand that comparing themselves to others (especially on social media) is destructive. The focus should be on their own personal growth.

5. Encouraging Growth and Learning

* Setting Realistic Goals: Help them set achievable goals and celebrate every small step forward. This builds a sense of competence and self-worth.

* Learning from Mistakes: Instead of dwelling on mistakes, help them see them as opportunities to learn and grow.

* Developing Gratitude: Encouraging them to regularly reflect on the things they are grateful for in their lives can shift the focus from lack to abundance.

How Can You Help?

Your role is to be a supporter, not a "fixer." Listen without judgment, offer encouragement, and gently offer these ideas. Sometimes, a supportive and understanding presence is the most valuable thing you can offer.

Why not everyone believes in the power of love

  Hi all, today I would like to share about the interesting topic, namely "Why not everyone believes in the power of love" the main reason why I choose that topic because many people can't empower themselves with the power of love, if you ask me why the power of love is important for us because it is kind of natural system that can empower our life journey, if we observe a bit about people who can't feel the power of love, what happens to them ? In my own opinion, people can't feel the power of love because they lack of high self esteem, from the data research, it says "people who can't possess the power of high self esteem, they don't have enough reason to give something they have to others", Not everyone believes in the power of love because their experiences, perspectives, and beliefs differ. Here are some of the main reasons:

1. Bad Past Experiences

People who have experienced heartbreak, betrayal, or toxic relationships may lose faith in love because of the pain they have experienced.

2. Environmental or Cultural Influences

In some cultures or environments, romantic love is not always seen as the main thing. The focus may be more on responsibility, social status, or practical needs.

3. Logical or Skeptical Views

Some people see love as a more emotional concept than logical, so they don't believe that love alone is enough to solve all problems or bring happiness.

4. Lack of Positive Experiences

People who have never experienced true love or a loving relationship may have a hard time understanding or believing in its power.

5. Trauma and Fear

Past trauma, such as rejection or loss, can make someone afraid to believe in love again.

6. Need for Independence

Some people believe that relying too much on love or relationships makes them lose their independence or control over their lives.

 7. Love is Seen as Something Temporary

Some people think that love is not eternal or easily changed, so they put more trust in things they consider more stable, such as career or personal ambition.

8. Love Doesn't Always Provide Solutions

In some situations, love alone is not enough to solve problems, such as differences in values, emotional needs, or external pressures. This makes some people feel that love is not as strong as it is portrayed.

Even so, for many people, love still has incredible power to heal, motivate, and give meaning to life. A person's perspective on love often develops over time and experience.

Helping people understand and give others the power of love is about helping them recognize the importance of love and how their actions can have a positive impact. Here are some ways to encourage people to think and act more lovingly:

1. Model Through Action

Demonstrate love in your actions, such as being supportive, listening, and caring. When people see the positive impact of your love, they are more likely to be inspired to do the same.

2. Invite Them to Reflect on Positive Experiences

Ask them when the last time they felt truly loved or supported someone else with love. Helping them remember that moment can bring back those positive feelings.

3. Emphasize the Importance of Empathy

Help them understand the feelings and needs of others. Teach them that love is about giving unconditional attention, which often begins with understanding another person’s perspective.

4. Talk About the Impact of Love

Discuss how love, in the form of caring, kindness, and support, can change a person’s life. For example, love can boost self-esteem, heal emotional wounds, or empower people to reach their full potential.

 5. Encourage Them to Give Love in Simple Ways

Start with small acts, like giving a sincere compliment, listening without judgment, or showing appreciation to someone close to you.

6. Encourage Them to Give Without Expecting Anything in Return

Teach them that true love is giving without expecting anything in return. When people understand that love can bring happiness to themselves and others, they are more motivated to share.

7. Respect Different Expressions of Love

Remind them that everyone has different ways of showing love (such as through words, actions, or gifts). Encouraging them to find their own unique ways can make this process easier and more authentic.

8. Demonstrate the Power of Forgiveness

Many people struggle to love because they are stuck in pain or resentment. Helping them understand that forgiveness is part of love can free them to give love to others.

9. Build Connections Through Genuine Conversations

Encourage them to have meaningful conversations with those close to them. Emotional connections are often the first step to building deep love.

 10. Create a Loving Environment

Being in a supportive and loving environment makes it easier for someone to receive and spread love. Encourage others to build a community like this.

How to recognize the love bombing signs

  Hi all, today I would like to share about the interesting topic, namely "How to recognize the love bombing signs", the main reason why I choose that topic because not every couple can recognize whether they really get the pure love or not, love bombing is not like a pure love, love bombing is kind of appraisal or puppy love, in order to make a living together with love, we must build act of self love at the first time, if we don't build act of self love, we will become the victim of love bombing, Love bombing is a manipulative tactic where someone overwhelms another person with excessive affection, attention, praise, and sometimes gifts, often early in a relationship, in order to gain control or influence. The person who is doing the love bombing might seem incredibly charming and attentive at first, making the recipient feel special, adored, and swept off their feet. However, this intense attention is usually used to manipulate or control the other person once they are emotionally attached.

Here are some examples of acts of self-love:

1. Setting Boundaries: Learning to say “no” when you feel unable or uncomfortable to do something. This is important so that you don’t feel pressured or burdened.

2. Doing Self-Care: Taking time to take care of your body, such as taking a relaxing bath, skin care, or exercising that you enjoy.

3. Meditation or Self-Reflection: Taking time to reflect, meditate, or just sit quietly to understand your feelings and thoughts.

4. Eating Healthy: Making sure your body gets good nutrition by eating healthy and nutritious foods.

5. Appreciating Yourself: Acknowledging your accomplishments and positive qualities, even if they are small. This can be done by writing a daily journal about the good things you have done.

6. Taking Time to Rest: Taking a break from your routine, work, or technology to recharge your mental and physical energy.

 7. Exercise: Keeping your body active with exercise that you enjoy is not only good for your body but can also improve your mood.

8. Self-Forgiveness: Learn to forgive yourself for past mistakes and be less hard on yourself when faced with failure.

9. Engage in Hobbies: Make time to do activities that make you happy, such as reading, gardening, or painting.

10. Self-Speak Kindly: Avoid negative self-talk and replace it with supportive and loving words to yourself.

Each of these actions is about giving yourself attention and love, which ultimately supports better mental and emotional health.

Avoiding the act of love bombing—where someone showers another person with excessive attention, affection, and gifts in order to manipulate or control—requires self-awareness, setting healthy boundaries, and ensuring your intentions are genuine in a relationship. Here are some ways to avoid love bombing:

1. Pace Your Emotions

Take things slow in a new relationship or friendship. Avoid overwhelming the other person with grand gestures or excessive declarations of affection early on. Healthy relationships build over time.

2. Set Realistic Expectations

Avoid promising too much too soon. Don’t offer emotional support, gifts, or attention that goes beyond what is reasonable at the stage of the relationship.

3. Respect Boundaries

Ensure that you respect the other person’s need for space. Healthy relationships involve mutual respect for each other's independence and time.

4. Be Honest About Your Feelings

Ensure your affection comes from a place of sincerity, not a need for control or validation. Check your motives and make sure your affection is a reflection of genuine feelings.

5. Avoid Overloading Communication

Excessive texting, calling, or checking in can feel suffocating to the other person. Give them time and space to respond and live their own life outside of the relationship.

6. Check for Codependency

Ensure that your emotional well-being isn’t completely reliant on the other person. Building your own interests and maintaining friendships outside of the relationship helps avoid putting too much pressure on the connection.

7. Be Aware of Emotional Manipulation

Avoid using affection or gifts as a way to make someone feel obligated to you. Love bombing often involves manipulating someone into feeling indebted, so ensure your actions are free from this motive.

8. Seek Feedback from Trusted Friends

Sometimes, friends or family may notice unhealthy patterns that you might overlook. Be open to their insights about the pace or intensity of your relationship.

9. Practice Self-Reflection

Regularly check in with yourself to evaluate your actions and intentions in relationships. Ensure that you are coming from a place of healthy affection, not control or insecurity.

By being mindful of these steps, you can foster genuine, balanced connections rather than overwhelming the other person with excessive attention, which may feel manipulative, hopefully this article can give you an insight, good luck.

Love is the greatest power in existence

  Hi, good readers, Today I would like to share about the interesting topic, namely "Love is the greatest power in existence", the main reason why i choose that topic because Many people want the power of love but not everyone can have it, in psychology, the power of love can heal a wounded heart and improve mental abilities, Treating the power of love well involves understanding its depth, nurturing it, and respecting it. Here are some ways to do that:

1. Communicate Openly: Honest communication builds trust and deepens the connection. Share your thoughts, feelings, and listen actively to your partner.

2. Show Appreciation: Regularly express gratitude for your partner's presence in your life. Small gestures, kind words, and acts of service go a long way.

3. Respect Boundaries: Understand and honor each other's personal space and boundaries. This shows respect and fosters mutual trust.

4. Be Supportive: Support each other's dreams, goals, and challenges. Being there for each other strengthens the bond.

5. Practice Forgiveness: Love thrives in an environment of forgiveness and understanding. Let go of past grievances and focus on growth.

6. Spend Quality Time: Make time for each other, regardless of how busy life gets. Shared experiences and memories deepen love.

7. Keep the Romance Alive: Continue to date each other, surprise each other, and keep the spark alive through gestures of love.

8. Grow Together: Love grows when both partners evolve together. Encourage each other’s personal development and shared values.

By nurturing these aspects, you can treat the power of love with the care and reverence it deserves, allowing it to flourish, creating self-love is a journey of understanding, acceptance, and nurturing yourself. Here are some steps to help cultivate self-love:

1. Practice Self-Acceptance: Embrace who you are, including your strengths and weaknesses. Accepting yourself without judgment is the foundation of self-love.

2. Develop Positive Self-Talk: Replace negative thoughts with positive affirmations. Encourage yourself as you would a friend and be mindful of how you speak to yourself.

3. Set Healthy Boundaries: Learn to say no when necessary and protect your energy. Respecting your own limits is an important aspect of self-care.

4. Prioritize Self-Care: Take care of your physical, mental, and emotional health. Regular exercise, a balanced diet, enough sleep, and relaxation activities contribute to overall well-being.

5. Forgive Yourself: Let go of past mistakes and forgive yourself. Understand that everyone makes mistakes, and they are opportunities for growth, not reasons for self-criticism.

6. Focus on Personal Growth: Invest time in activities that help you grow, such as learning new skills, pursuing hobbies, and setting personal goals. Growth builds confidence and self-respect.

7. Surround Yourself with Positivity: Spend time with people who uplift and support you. Positive relationships reinforce self-love and help you see your own worth.

8. Celebrate Your Achievements: Acknowledge and celebrate your successes, no matter how small. Recognizing your progress boosts self-esteem.

9. Practice Mindfulness: Be present in the moment and connect with yourself regularly. Mindfulness helps you stay grounded and more in tune with your needs and emotions.

10. Be Compassionate with Yourself: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, especially during tough times. Self-compassion is key to maintaining a loving relationship with yourself.

By consistently applying these practices, you can nurture a deep sense of self-love that will empower you in all areas of life.

The power of love and forgiveness

   Hi, good readers, How are you? Today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "The power of love and forgiveness", The main reason why I chose this topic is because not everyone applies what they get from feelings of love,  If we explore further, most people will do something for the sake of desire, but not all desires are able to create love, "The power to forgive" refers to a person's ability or power to forgive others for mistakes, injustices, or hurtful actions. This involves letting go of feelings of anger, resentment, or hatred towards the wrongdoer, and may also involve giving a second chance or healing a damaged relationship. Forgiveness can be a very difficult act, but it can also bring peace and healing to both the forgiver and the forgiven.

Creating feelings of love and forgiving others' mistakes is a process that involves self-understanding, empathy, and constant effort. 

 Here are some steps that may help:

 1. Recognizing Your Own Feelings: Be aware of your feelings of anger or hurt. Acknowledging these feelings is the first step towards healing.

 2. Empathy: Try to understand the perspective and circumstances of the person who made the mistake. Knowing the reasons behind their actions can help in forgiveness.

 3. Remembering the Good: Focus on the good things the person has done and their positive qualities. This can help reduce negative feelings.

 4. Talk to the Person: If possible, communicate your feelings honestly and openly. This can help resolve misunderstandings and rebuild relationships.

 5. Accept That Everyone Can Make Mistakes: Remember that no one is perfect, and everyone can make mistakes. Accepting this reality can make it easier for us to forgive.

 6. Meditation or Prayer: Spiritual practices such as meditation or prayer can help calm the mind and open the heart to forgiveness.

 7. Focus on Your Own Healing: Sometimes, forgiveness is more about healing yourself than the other person. Focus on your emotional well-being and how forgiveness can reduce the burden of negativity in your life.

 8. Taking Time: Forgiveness is a process that takes time. Give yourself space and time to heal without feeling rushed.

 9. Professional Help: If negative feelings are too much to overcome on your own, consider seeking help from a counselor or therapist who can help you through this process. 

 With practice and patience, feelings of love and the ability to forgive can grow and develop within a person, forgiving mistakes can be very difficult because it involves various deep emotional and psychological factors. Here are some reasons why forgiveness can be a challenge:

 1. Emotional Pain: When someone hurts us, the emotional pain experienced can be very deep. Overcoming this pain takes time and effort.

 2. Sense of Betrayal: If the person who hurt us is someone we trust or love, the resulting sense of betrayal can make the process of forgiveness more difficult.

 3. Anger and Resentment: Strong emotions such as anger and hatred can hinder our ability to view situations objectively and forgive others.

 4. Feeling of Unfairness: Forgiveness can feel like ignoring or trivializing the wrong done, which may feel unfair to us.

 5. Hurt Self-Esteem: Other people's mistakes can hurt our self-esteem, making us feel belittled or unappreciated.

 6. Fear of Being Hurt Again: There is a fear that forgiveness will make us vulnerable to being hurt again in the future.

 7. Difficulty Overcoming Trauma: Some mistakes, especially those involving trauma or abuse, can be very difficult to forgive because of their deep and lasting impact.

 8. Ego and Pride: Sometimes, our ego gets in the way of the forgiveness process because we don't want to appear weak or accept that we could be hurt.

 9. Lack of Empathy: Difficulty forgiving can arise from an inability to see the situation from the other person's perspective and understand their motivations or difficulties.

 10. Environmental and Cultural Influences: The social and cultural environment in which we live can influence our views on forgiveness. Some cultures may view forgiveness as a sign of weakness.

 Although difficult, forgiveness is an important step to healing and personal growth. By understanding the reasons behind difficulties in forgiving, we can more easily face and overcome these obstacles, hopefully this article can help you how to create harmony in your life, good luck.

Journey to us focus on the family

      Hi, good readers, howdy? Today I would like to share about the interesting topic, namely "Journey to us focus on the family", The main reason why I choose this topic is because not everyone can focus on their family matters, there are some people who prefer to be busy with their work or career rather than focus on their family, In my opinion, the attitude in this decision is not good because it puts aside the position of the family and considers the family only as a home, a journey to focus on family typically means taking time and effort to prioritize and strengthen family relationships. This can involve spending quality time together, supporting each other through challenges, creating lasting memories, and fostering a sense of unity and love. It may also involve making lifestyle changes to ensure that family becomes a central aspect of daily life, such as adjusting work schedules, planning family activities, and engaging in open communication.

    Building a harmonious family involves consistent effort and commitment. Here are some tips:

1. Open Communication: Encourage open and honest communication. Listen to each other without judgment and express your thoughts and feelings clearly.

2. Quality Time: Spend quality time together. Engage in activities that everyone enjoys and create opportunities for bonding.

3. Respect and Empathy: Show respect and empathy towards each family member. Understand and appreciate each other's perspectives and feelings.

4. Set Boundaries: Establish clear and reasonable boundaries. Ensure that everyone understands and respects these boundaries.

5. Shared Responsibilities: Divide household responsibilities fairly. Encourage cooperation and teamwork.

6. Support Each Other: Offer support and encouragement during tough times. Celebrate each other’s successes and milestones.

7. Conflict Resolution: Address conflicts calmly and constructively. Focus on finding solutions rather than assigning blame.

8. Family Traditions: Create and maintain family traditions. These can provide a sense of continuity and belonging.

9. Healthy Balance: Maintain a healthy balance between work, school, and family time. Ensure that family time is a priority.

10. Positive Environment: Foster a positive and nurturing environment. Show love, appreciation, and kindness regularly.

11. Teach Values: Instill important values such as honesty, integrity, and compassion. Lead by example.

12. Seek Help if Needed: Don’t hesitate to seek professional help if you’re facing challenges that you can’t resolve on your own. Family therapy can be beneficial.

Building a harmonious family is an ongoing process that requires patience, effort, and love from all members, hopefully this article can help you how to build good relationship with Family, good luck

When someone get angry easily, he needs love the most

          Hi smart people, howdy? I hope you always have a good day, today I would like to share how to calm ourselves from anger, as we know human are emotional creature and every human has been graced with several intelligence, one of the most powerful intelligence is emotional intelligence, it has power to create a light and darkness for their heart, the light of heart can be represented by love, whereas the darkness of heart can be represented by anger, when human create love, it automatically can flow something benefit to the human's heart, such as grateful, fully appreciated, serenity, patience, etc. When human create anger, it automatically crash the logical mind and give a toxic in the human's mind, please beware about the power of emotion you have chosen because your future is shaped based on the quality of your emotion, don't hear wild notion where it can influence you to get angry, the human's emotional character is like the water, it can flow something benefit and also it can crash something meaningful, remember this note; when you are unable to awaken the power of love, automatically you are able to awaken the power of anger, now you may think about this question, “why most people get angry if they are able to create love?” because they don’t appreciate something valuable and they trust something which it can't be trusted, I have ever written in another article “life will give reaction when there is action” means when people get angry easily, because they preempt a bad judgment to their life and life automatically will give bad reaction to them, so we need to monitor our daily habit before it will be taken over by a sense of darkness.

Remember this note; life is designed to give reaction and nature is designed to give something reliable, if you see angry person around you, means he doesn't have ability to control where his emotional flowing current, if he doesn't want to feel angry, he must increase his survival instinct like what reptilian does to its environment, sometimes we can adopt the reptilian instinct to make sure we can fight our anger and we can continue our exist on earth, when we are trapped between rock and bottom, we shouldn't show an anger reaction, but we can use our survival instinct to keep alive and keep searching how to find solution, now the problem is“are you interested with bad reaction or good reaction?” if you are interested with good reaction, you will find a way how to find the nearest solution, but if you are interested with bad reaction, life will give a bad reaction to you and you will be punished with a bad reaction, here are the signs you are interested with a good reaction; you can create serenity, you can preempt harmony in the human relationship although there is dispute situation, we must understand that feel angry is not part of huge power, but it is part of self-punishment, if this condition is repeated over and over again, it can leave big hole destruction to the inner soul peace, before someone gets angry, he must build love and improve his survival instinct.

 This life will not give bad reaction if there is no bad action from the human’s emotional behavior, but unfortunately most people don't realize their power of words which it can create different impact to their lives, when people say to them "how can I do it? and "what should I do to avoid a sense of angry?", the human's survival instinct will grow up and it will give the possibility to find solution, beware of our words because it is very powerful, it can create inspiration or it can create desperation, the unpleasant thing which it happens in this life is not part of the life purpose, but it’s part of wrong direction where it has been created by human’s lack of survival instinct to fight their ignorance of knowledge, starting today, don’t get overworked  when you have job because it has potentially create a sense of anger and also please don't act casually when you have a clear target to be pursued because it will decline your survival instinct, hopefully after you read this article, it will help you to recognize where your power of emotional intelligence is going.

Signs a man is in love

          Hi smart people, howdy? hopefully you always have the abundance of happiness, health and prosperity, today I would like to share about topic “Signs a man is in love”, the reason why I choose that topic because not every man recognizes what they feel about their love's feeling, if you ask me why I choose that topic because recently many couples get quarreled with the serious problem and they decide to break up their relationship rather than thinking rationally to make new agreement, it’s very ironic, if you ask me why not every man can acknowledge their love feeling to woman because they don't know how to fulfill what woman need, let me give you a new opinion about love; the problem in love shouldn’t be considered as problem, it is just adaptation, if a man wants to do something with his love's feeling, he must ask himself "what kind of my service that I can grant it to woman, here is the first sign that man is in love; he will do something for woman's need and accept what woman demands, this sign is very common, if man isn't in love affair, he will not do more than what woman demands, man will think there is always consequence when he makes a relationship with woman.  

Here is the second sign that man is in love; he will not give his attention to be given to other woman who is more attractive to him, unless it is given to his woman, only faithful man who can stay together with his own woman, do you know that being faithful is part of expensive characteristic, it is not easy for man who have possessed the material wealth, sometimes there is man who makes a relationship more than 1 woman to be approached, here is the third sign that man is in love; he can't focus to his job when his woman phoned him, this is common, when a man makes a relationship with his woman, he will say something softly on the phone when he works, he will manage his priority target in his activity when woman tries to approach him, here is the fourth sign that man is in love; he will try to flirt to his woman, this is part of man's natural feeling, only man in love who gives his flirting to his woman, hopefully this article can give you an idea how to improve your daily life, good luck.   

Word of courage

         Hi smart people, howdy? hopefully you always have the abundance of happiness, health and prosperity, today I would like to share about “Word of courage”, the main reason why I choose that topic because many people believe that words have possessed the power to change what we believe or change what we focus, some people consider courage is part of self-determined action, but to gain the huge power from the word of mouth is not easy to do and it is not simple to express, do you know why I say such thing because the quality of word of mouth is depending on the person character's quality, if we say something without having high quality from our life experience, as impact, we will use unqualified words when we try to speak at the first time, basically we must beware with our word of mouth because other people try to remember what we say to them, if we say something which it has nothing to do with their pleasure standard, probably they will label to us with something we don't really like to listen, remember this; word of courage is not like the motivational words, word of courage is part of self-possessed, meaning, someone who can prove that he is able to remain calm and feel confident even though he is in a difficult situation, if you have built self-possession power within yourself, meaning, you succeed to advise yourself even though you don't really need it or you hate to hear it.

        Have you ever asked a question like this "why do I need to show my courage to face the truth?" because there is no single person can guarantee your future, except yourself, if you want to save your future, you must have a mission which gives a big impact to mankind, in order to apply that mission to reality, we need to borrow God's power to manifest what we intend, remember this note; to attract the power of courage, we must learn how to adapt with something we really hate to do or we adapt with something we don't really need to do, as long as we only think comfortable thing is more important than uncomfortable thing, our word of mouth can't make us courage, instead our word of mouth will immobilize our mentality, courage will not develop by itself without we apply the power of caring to anybody else, we must have a mission to solve as much as problem before the time of danger is coming, the meaning of "the time of danger" is we already entered into the crisis, remember; courage will not work to us when we already enter into crisis, the good moment to start courage is making our situation as if we were in crisis mode, maybe it seems crazy or abnormal, no, it is totally true, if we start applying the courage to change the situation at whim, instead, we will get swept by the crisis, the crisis will destroy everything without any left,  I think my explanation is enough, hopefully this article can give you an idea how to improve your life, good luck.  

Do you need to pay taxes if you don't work

       Hi smart people, howdy? welcome back with me, Fian, hopefully you always have the abundance of happiness, health and prosperity, today I would like to share about the topic “Do you need to pay taxes if you don't work”, the main reason why I choose that topic because many unemployed people believe that pay taxes is a must, based on the government rule "every employee who works at company must pay taxes, but tax is paid based on the wage's cut?", if our condition is unemployed, we don't need to pay taxes, we just need to report to the national tax regulatory agency with the written report, we just need to fill in the form where it is stated that we no longer work at the previous company, maybe you have question, "is it enough by doing like that?", of course, it is very simple, when you work again at the new company, you will be asked by showing your last tax payment in the previous company, so you don't need to worry when you don't pay taxes when you are unemployed, for the most important thing is you report the taxes payment at local government agency.

     In Indonesia, unemployed people get special treatment from the government by paying no taxes, I assume other country will put the same policy as Indonesia, now there is new government program in Indonesia, it is called the employment agency, it is obligated by facilitating unemployed people's lives by giving some training programs and unemployed people will be got a chance to work again, either following the government's company policy or the private's company policy, if you work at the private company, your salary level will be determined by the company's product, if you work at stamping / steel industry, your salary will get categorized in the level 3, do you know why? because the stamping/steel industry has no significant contribution impact at the country, it is different when you work at oil company or mining company, your salary level will  get categorized in the level 1 or 2 because the oil company or mining company have contributed a lot to the country, especially in Indonesia, if you are paid well, don't forget to pay taxes because the benefit will be returned when you no longer work at the same company,  I think my explanation is enough, hopefully this article can give you an idea how to improve your life, good luck.  

Ways on how to grow in faith

Run your life by hinges on faith

       Hi smart people, howdy? welcome back with me, Fian, hopefully you always have the abundance of happiness, health and prosperity, today I would like to share about the topic “Ways on how to grow in faith”, the main reason why I choose that topic because not everyone believes in what they dream, besides that, not everyone is willing to recognize the power of faith, I know that's is not simple to grow in faith, but we must do something beyond what we are capable if we want to grow our faith, our faith is like the fruit seed, it can't be seen at the first time, but it will continue working if we commit to serve what our faith needs with our resources,  our resource is time, experience, unpleasantness, courage, commitment, consistent action, unrelenting belief and surrender the outcome to divine's timing, faith will not grow if we stop doing the process or stop our action, as long as we can create the innovation, as long as we can attempt, as long as our enthusiasm still exists, so our faith will grow, if you ask me "what if I do something without faith, is it possible?", I don't think it is possible, if you do something without faith, you will not do it for longer period of time even though other people motivate you to do every day, our faith must born from self-awareness and self-competence, not other people's motivation, the reason why having faith is important because it can give you a power to change something that may give you a doubt, but if you feel there is big power within you until you feel something strange, that's effect of faith growth.

     

        

        Faith will not grow when you have no enthusiasm and no interest at all, that's it, if you ask me "where interest and enthusiasm is coming from?" it comes from deep faith, at this moment, I would like to share some ways how to grow in faith, here is the first way how to grow in faith; you must continue what you start even though you can't see the uncertain result, meaning, whatever you get from reality, it based on what you develop from yourself, if you want to grow in faith, you must continue what you start even though you can't see the outcome, here is the second way how to grow in faith; you don't complain about what life does for you, meaning, you don't doubt about what you receive from reality either you get reward or punishment, if you keep your mentality until you don't complain about something, it indicates that your faith gets stronger, if you still doubt about what you start, meaning, your faith is fragile, so you need to gain some knowledge or practice to accelerate your faith, if your faith is strong enough, you can manifest your visualization into reality very easy, all depends on you, here is the third way how to grow in faith; you keep enjoying the learning process even though it is very tough,  I think my explanation is enough, hopefully this article can give you an idea how to improve your life, good luck.  

It's a good day to have a good day

 

    Hi smart people, howdy? welcome back with me, Fian, hopefully you always have the abundance of happiness, health and prosperity, today I would like to share about the topic “It's a good day to have a good day”, the reason why I choose that topic because many people consider good day is the myth, at this moment I will reveal something important about life, for those people who consider every day is the same day and no difference, means, there is something wrong to what they do in daily activity, but if we take a look from different perceptive, there is no good thing will happen in the most day if there is no sincerity for sharing our kindness to others, it sounds familiar to hear about it, that’s key how to start a good day in our most day, to create good day constantly, we must be self-reliant and do good things although other people don't need it, we can’t demand people to do something if we ourselves aren't sincere to believe about what we did in the past, remember; life is full of responsibility, besides that, life is always demanding something different of you without any compromising, you must be okay with that, life doesn't ask you to like what life does something to you, life only asks you to learn something from something unusual in your most day, so you can’t be skeptical when you get something difficult in life because you aren’t entitled to debate about it, your main duty as human being is adapt with new circumstance, stay curious about tough life challenge, prepare a worse-case scenario to strengthen a mental strength, now do you think you can have a good day all the time? it depends on your faith, if you show your dedication to the right purpose, you will be pursued by luck

  We can’t escape from what we deserve because every action, every belief and every commitment we made has been counted as the consequence, in order to have a good day, we must be earnest to do something what we can and we stop cursing something what we can’t, all decision we make has been measured by our capacity, God will not burden human with something outside of their capacity, if we can finish something difficult because we have practiced our expertise in tough time, we don’t need to argue why life is offering the difficult exam to us? God knew our capacity and He predicted long time ago before the difficult exam would be given to us, besides that, the level of our personality and our patience capacity are the guarantee how to pass the life test, to survive in this world, we shouldn’t differentiate between good day and bad day, if your ability doesn’t match with good opportunity, you are failed, if you are not willing to decide although your ability matches with good opportunity, you are failed as well, now if you ask me "what kind of the guarantee I will have in good day?" the answer is you receive something good after you do good things and you will not stop what you can do for others, I think my explanation is enough, hopefully this article can give you an idea how to improve your life, good luck. 

First love story

  Hi, good reader, howdy? welcome back with me, hopefully your life career is going well, today I would like to share about the topic "First love story", the main reason why I choose that topic because many people don't realize when they create the first love story, then they will receive something illogical, if you ask me why many people don't realize when they get the first love story because they only focus on the hope rather than what love demands, what most people want is how to get pleasure more and more again, no wonder they would be mistreated by their first love by experiencing the pain of broken heart, I have ever shared in another article that every human will not get the power of love by receiving more than what they can give, that's natural law, if we always want to get more love without any intention to give something more than what we reward to others, as impact, we will become a love beggar / love slave until we die, the bad news is we will live like a beggar in the real life if we treat our sense of love such thing, we shouldn't manipulate the natural law if we want to feel peace at any time, the main problem why we can't detect the first love at the first time because we believe with what our eyes can see rather than to believe what our eyes can't see, as human being who knows nothing about the consequences of feeling loved, we must learn about the consequence before we will put our sense or love to others, the best thing we can do when we feel loved with our first love is we treat our sense of love with open-hearted, knowledge and self-awareness to be ready to feel broken heart when we don't get what we expect, if we look at reality now is many people rely on other people's love rather than their own sense of love to themselves, that's sign of desperate person's life, here is the first requirement how to improve our love story is we must believe that we can give something worth to us more than what others does for us, here is what makes us to feel  broken heart is we are having huge expectation on something which can be permanent with us where it can't be with us forever, if our sense of love to Almighty Allah is lower than our sense of love to the material world, as impact, we will feel insecure, unhappy, depression, here is the good news: if our sense of love to Allah is larger than what we love so far, as impact He will put a sense of liking to us and He will make us to love something useful, meaningful and prestigious.

 

  Now you must be alert when you want to save your future from fake love, remember this: love is powerful energy, but if we don't know how to treat love very well, love will make us looked stupid, regret and powerless, the first person we must give a respect is ourselves, the evidence that we can respect to ourselves is we use our time, energy, mind and space to deal with something uncertain, in my opinion: to save our future, we need great power of love and we can use it to increase our natural ability, e.g. communication skill, analysis skill, troubleshooting skill, if we lack sensing of love to amplify our skill, as result, we indirectly expand our inability or handicap, here is the second requirement how to improve our love story is we must leave unproductive habit, the main reason why we must leave unproductive habit because it is no longer needed by the power of love, maybe you ever hear about the love quotes: at the first time of trying you will feel difficult, during in the middle of process you feel messy, in the last journey you will feel confident, now your decision will shape your destiny, if what you do in your career can invite the greatest feeling of love, your career will multiply your reputation and the whole world will find you even though you don't need it very much, I think my explanation is enough, hopefully this article can give you an insight how to improve your life, good luck.