How to not be trapped to the desire to possess something

  Hi, Today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "How to not be trapped to the desire to possess something", the reason I chose this topic is that many people experience the same problem regarding attachment to expensive objects,  Let's take a deeper look at how to avoid becoming trapped by the desire to possess something valuable. This is a common problem in modern society, where we are constantly bombarded with advertisements and messages encouraging us to buy more things.

Why Do We Get Trapped in the Desire to Possess?

Before we discuss the solution, it's important to understand why we are so susceptible to the desire to possess something valuable:

- Social Influence: We often compare ourselves to others, especially through social media. Seeing others own luxury items can trigger envy and a desire to own the same things.

- Advertising and Marketing: The advertising industry spends billions of dollars each year convincing us that we need certain items to be happy, successful, or accepted.

- Emotions: We often use purchasing as a way to cope with negative emotions like stress, boredom, or sadness. This is known as "retail therapy."

- Identity: We tend to associate the things we own with our identity. For example, someone might feel that owning a luxury car will make them appear more successful or attractive.

 - Habits: Impulse buying can be a difficult habit to break. The more often we buy something without thinking, the easier it is to do it in the future.

In-Depth Strategies for Overcoming the Desire to Possess

Here are more in-depth and comprehensive strategies to help you overcome the desire to possess something valuable:

1. Self-Reflection and Awareness:

- Identify Triggers: Recognize the situations, emotions, or people that trigger your desire to buy. Do you feel more vulnerable when you're stressed, bored, or after seeing a particular advertisement?

- Question Your Motivation: Before buying something, ask yourself why you want it. Do you really need it, or do you just want it for emotional or social reasons?

- Shopping Journal: Record all your purchases, including the price, the reason for the purchase, and how you felt afterward. This can help you identify unhealthy shopping behavior patterns.

2. Shift Your Mindset:

- Focus on Intrinsic Values: Shift your attention from extrinsic values ​​(such as status or social recognition) to intrinsic values ​​(such as happiness, satisfaction, and personal growth).

 - Mindfulness Practice: Practicing mindfulness can help you become more aware of your thoughts and emotions, allowing you to respond more wisely to desires.

- Be Grateful for What You Have: Take time each day to be grateful for what you already have. This can help you appreciate the value of the simple things in life and reduce the urge to constantly seek more.

3. Manage Your Environment:

- Limit Exposure to Advertising: Unsubscribe from promotional emails, avoid watching TV full of ads, and reduce the time you spend on social media.

- Surround Yourself with Like-Minded People: Find friends or a community that is also trying to avoid getting caught up in consumerism.

- Create a Quiet, Distraction-Free Space: Create an environment in your home that encourages calm and reflection, not consumption.

4. Practical Strategies:

- Create a Budget and Stick to It: Having a clear budget will make you more aware of where your money is going and make it easier to resist impulse purchases.

 - Wait 30 Days: Before buying something you want, wait 30 days. Often, the urge will go away on its own.

- Use Cash: Paying with cash can make you more aware of how much money you spend.

- Repair, Don't Replace: Before buying a new item, consider whether your old one can be repaired.

- Rent or Borrow: If you only need a particular item occasionally, consider renting or borrowing it instead of buying it.

5. Focus on Experiences and Personal Growth:

- Invest in Experiences: Shift your money from buying things to buying experiences, such as trips, concerts, or classes.

- Develop Hobbies and Interests: Find activities you enjoy and that give you a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction.

- Give Back: Helping others can give you a deeper sense of purpose and connection than buying luxury items.

By combining these strategies and adapting them to your personal context, you can reduce your desire for possessions and focus on the things that truly matter in life.  Remember that true happiness is not found in material goods, but in meaningful relationships, rewarding experiences, and personal growth.

How to Deal with Intrusive Thoughts:

   Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "How to Deal with Intrusive Thoughts",  The reason I chose this topic is because many people's minds are constantly working without direction, there are several factors that keep our minds working, even when we don't think we're consciously thinking about anything:

- Default Mode Network (DMN):

- Definition: The DMN is a brain network that's active when we're not focused on a specific task, or when we're resting. This network is involved in processes like remembering the past, imagining the future, and thinking about ourselves and others.

- Role: When we're not focused on an external task, the DMN takes over and processes information automatically. This is what keeps us thinking, even when we're not trying to.

- Automatic Thoughts:

- Definition: Automatic thoughts are thoughts that arise spontaneously without our awareness. These thoughts are often related to our beliefs, values, and past experiences.

- Role: Automatic thoughts can influence our emotions and behavior. If our automatic thoughts tend to be negative, we may feel anxious or sad for no apparent reason.

- Memory:

- Role: Our brain is constantly processing and organizing memories. When we're not focused on a specific task, our brain may automatically recall past events or think about future plans.

 - Unresolved Emotions:

- Role: Emotions that we haven't fully processed can linger in our thoughts. For example, if we experience a traumatic event, we may dwell on it even when we're not trying to.

- Stress and Anxiety:

- Role: Stress and anxiety can make our thoughts more active and difficult to control. When we're stressed or anxious, we may dwell on our problems or worry about the future.

- Habits:

- Role: Certain thoughts can become habits. For example, if we're used to criticizing ourselves, we may continue to do so even when we're not aware of it.

How to Deal with Intrusive Thoughts:

- Mindfulness: Practice being fully aware of the present moment. Focus on your breath or the physical sensations you're experiencing.

- Meditation: Meditation can help calm your mind and reduce stress.

- Journaling: Write down your thoughts and feelings. This can help process unresolved emotions.

- Therapy: If your thoughts are constantly interfering with your life, consider seeking professional help from a therapist.

- Exercise: Exercise can help reduce stress and improve your mood.

 - Get Enough Sleep: Lack of sleep can make our minds more active and difficult to control.

- Limit Caffeine and Alcohol Consumption: Caffeine and alcohol can exacerbate stress and anxiety.

By understanding the factors that keep our minds busy and implementing strategies to overcome them, we can gain more control over our thoughts and live a calmer and happier life.

What causes a person's life tests to never end?

   Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "What causes a person's life tests to never end?" The main reason I chose this topic is because not everyone is able to understand what reality wants, Many people do things that have a negative impact because they are unable to pass the tests of life, According to observations by experts in the field of psychology, life tests are used to determine the worthiness of each person's skill before they gain great benefits, For now, tests must be given to humans so that humans do not do things that damage the moral order of social life,  besides that, so that humans recognize who their creator is after passing the test of life, according to my observations, without passing the test, humans will not want to recognize who their creator is,  Even though this life test is currently going on, one day there will be a moment when humans will not experience the same event, if humans refuse to undergo the tests of life, humans will definitely be made to suffer more, The test will end when God judges that humans are no longer able to pass the test, now let me tell you about there are several factors that can cause life's trials to feel endless or even permanent:

1. Inability to Learn Lessons:

- Explanation: If someone continually repeats the same mistakes and fails to learn from their experiences, similar trials will continue to come. These trials serve as reminders or warnings for that person to change and grow.

- Example: Someone who consistently fails in romantic relationships due to the same behavioral patterns (for example, being overly possessive or dishonest) will continue to experience failure until they recognize and change those patterns.

2. Unforgiveness:

- Explanation: Resentment, hatred, and an inability to forgive others (or themselves) can weigh on the mind and heart, preventing someone from moving on and finding peace.

- Example: Someone who continually holds a grudge against someone who has hurt them will find it difficult to be happy and live a peaceful life.

3. Being Trapped in Negative Thought Patterns:

- Explanation: Negative thought patterns such as pessimism, self-pity, and a victim mentality can make someone feel helpless and unable to change their circumstances. This can prolong suffering and prevent solutions from arriving.

- Example: Someone who consistently feels unlucky or unloved will find it difficult to see opportunities and accept kindness from others.

4. Unwillingness to Accept Help:

- Explanation: Sometimes, a person is too proud or embarrassed to ask for help from others. However, support from family, friends, or professionals can be very helpful in getting through difficult times.

- Example: Someone experiencing depression is reluctant to consult a psychologist for fear of being seen as crazy or weak.

5. Inaction:

- Explanation: Simply hoping and praying without making a real effort to change the situation will not produce results. Life's trials require real action to overcome them.

- Example: Someone who is in debt simply prays for a windfall without trying to find additional work or manage their finances better.

6. Ingratitude:

- Explanation: Focusing on shortcomings and difficulties without appreciating what they already have can leave a person feeling unhappy and unmotivated to move forward. - Example: Someone who constantly complains about their job without realizing that many others are unemployed.

7. Not Surrendering to God:

- Explanation: In a spiritual context, not surrendering to God and not believing that God has a better plan can lead to despair and a loss of hope.

- Example: Someone who loses faith after experiencing a disaster will find it difficult to find meaning in their suffering.

Hopefully, this explanation is helpful!

The side effects of overjustification in reality

   Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "the side effects of overjustification in reality", The main reason why I chose this topic is because many people, especially women, often fall victim to over-justification, in reality many sellers of goods try to exaggerate a justification to the potential buyers until they cannot use logic optimally, The side effect that occurs is that buyers end up buying a product that they don't actually need, in Psychology, the overjustification effect is a fascinating psychological phenomenon because it challenges our common assumptions about motivation.

 Here’s what makes it interesting:

It shows that rewards can backfire.

Intuitively, we think giving people rewards (money, praise, prizes) should increase their motivation. But the overjustification effect shows that if someone already enjoys an activity, adding an external reward can actually reduce their intrinsic motivation. For example, a child who loves drawing may draw less often once they start getting prizes for it—because the focus shifts from “I draw because I enjoy it” to “I draw to get the prize.”

It highlights the fragility of intrinsic motivation.

People’s natural curiosity, creativity, or playfulness can be disrupted if the task is reframed as “work” rather than “fun.” This insight is widely applied in education, parenting, and workplace management.

It reveals how our minds make sense of our own behavior.

The effect is explained by self-perception theory: we often infer our internal motives by observing what we do. If someone notices, “I’m doing this because I’m being paid,” they may conclude they don’t actually like it that much.

It complicates the use of incentives.

The effect doesn’t mean all rewards are bad. It suggests that the type of reward and how it’s presented matter. For example:

✅Unexpected or symbolic rewards (like verbal praise) usually don’t undermine intrinsic motivation.

✅Tangible, expected rewards (like money or prizes) for doing something already enjoyable are more likely to cause the effect.

It connects motivation to identity.

When people feel that they are doing something out of choice and enjoyment, it becomes part of their identity (“I am a person who likes drawing”). When it feels imposed or transactional, it weakens that identity connection.

In short, the overjustification effect is interesting because it reveals the paradox that too much external motivation can kill internal drive, and it shows how our sense of “why we do things” is constructed in subtle, sometimes counterintuitive ways.

Overjustification (or the overjustification effect) is a psychological phenomenon in which providing external rewards or rewards for an activity that is already internally enjoyed can diminish a person's interest in that activity, simply put, when someone does something because they enjoy it (intrinsic motivation), and then we introduce external incentives (such as money, praise, or prizes), that person can begin to associate the activity with the reward they receive. As a result, their original (intrinsic) motivation weakens or even disappears.

Effects of Overjustification

Here are some of the impacts that can arise from overjustification:

* Loss of Internal Motivation: This is the most important effect. Someone who initially enjoyed painting because it felt satisfying, for example, may lose interest after being paid for each painting. They are no longer painting for pleasure, but for the money. Once the reward is gone, their motivation disappears as well.

* Decrease in Quality and Creativity: When the focus shifts from personal satisfaction to external rewards, the quality of work often declines. People no longer strive to do their best or be the most creative, but merely to meet the minimum requirements to receive a reward. This is particularly evident in jobs that require original thinking or innovative solutions. 

* Transactional Mindset: This phenomenon transforms a person's relationship with an activity or job into a transactional one. "I'll do this if I get paid or rewarded." This can damage dynamics in the workplace, education, and even in hobbies or personal relationships.

Real-Life Examples

* Children and Reading: A child who enjoys reading books because the stories are interesting may stop reading once their parents give them money for each book they finish. Once their parents stop giving them money, the child may no longer want to read, as their motivation has shifted from "enjoying reading" to "reading for money."

* Hobbies and Work: Someone who initially enjoyed photography as a hobby may feel pressured and lose their passion when they make it a full-time job. The pressure to make money and meet client requests can diminish the initial enjoyment.

This phenomenon demonstrates that sometimes well-intentioned rewards can have unexpected and damaging consequences. Therefore, it is important to be careful when offering rewards, especially for activities driven by intrinsic motivation.

Finding a meaning in the pleasure obtained

   Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "finding a meaning in the pleasure obtained", The reason I chose this topic is because many people cannot find meaning in their daily activities, they think that the activities they get cannot give much meaning to them, We need to realize that not all the activities we do can provide meaning, but we ourselves must give meaning to the activities themselves. to be meaningful, pleasure is not just a feeling, but also needs to be connected to deeper values. Several factors can transform pleasure into a more meaningful experience.

✅Connection to Personal Values

Pleasure becomes meaningful when it aligns with your values. For example, enjoying nature while hiking becomes meaningful if you deeply appreciate nature and its beauty. This pleasure is not just about the scenery, but also about recognizing the values ​​you believe in.

✅Connection to Human Connection

Sharing a pleasurable experience with others can make it much more meaningful, a delicious dinner becomes more than just a delicious meal when enjoyed with friends or family you care about, the presence of others enriches the experience, making it a cherished memory.

✅Encouraging Personal Growth

Pleasure that stimulates personal growth can create meaning. Learning to play a new musical instrument can be challenging at first, but the satisfaction of successfully playing it can provide profound meaning. This pleasure arises from the process of achievement and self-development.

✅Awareness and Mindfulness

Often, we enjoy things without fully realizing it.  With mindfulness practice, we can better appreciate every detail of the experience. Sensing the texture, aroma, and flavor of a cup of tea, for example, can transform a simple pleasure into a meaningful moment.

✅Recalling Memories or Nostalgia

A pleasure can be meaningful if it triggers nostalgia or reminds us of a fond memory from the past. Listening to a favorite song from our youth, for example, isn't just about the music, but also about the memories, emotions, and self-identity of that time.

✅The Element of Sacrifice or Effort

Something obtained through effort or sacrifice tends to be more appreciated. A dish cooked after hours of experimenting with a new recipe will taste more delicious and meaningful than food purchased directly. The process adds value to the result.

Essentially, pleasure becomes meaningful when it transcends momentary sensations and connects with important aspects of our lives, such as values, relationships, growth, and memories.

Giving meaning to pleasure is not just an act, but a fundamental need that provides many benefits to our lives. Here are some reasons why it's important to do so.

✅Prevent Boredom and Addiction

Without meaning, pleasure can become a shallow cycle. For example, when you eat a delicious meal, you might seek the same sensation, and over time, the pleasure will fade. However, if you give pleasure meaning—for example, by appreciating the process of cooking it or enjoying it with a loved one—the experience becomes more valuable and less boring. This also helps us avoid constantly seeking pleasure from external sources.

✅Building Stronger Relationships

When we share pleasure and give meaning to the moment, we strengthen bonds with others. Birthday parties, for example, aren't just about cake and gifts, but also about memories, laughter, and gratitude. By giving meaning to these moments, we not only enjoy what happens but also create memories that strengthen our relationships with those closest to us.

✅Increasing Happiness and Life Satisfaction

Meaningful pleasure tends to lead to deeper and more lasting satisfaction. Momentary pleasure (hedonic happiness) can disappear in a matter of minutes, while meaningful happiness (eudaimonic happiness) comes from engagement, purpose, and personal growth. When we find meaning in pleasure, we not only feel happy but also feel our lives are richer and more meaningful.

Giving meaning to pleasure also helps us appreciate each moment. This transforms fleeting pleasures into valuable experiences that can improve our overall quality of life.

Why Do People Feel Lonely in the Digital Age

   Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "Why Do People Feel Lonely in the Digital Age",  The main reason why I chose this topic is because many people experience loneliness in this digital world, According to my analysis, the cause of human loneliness is social inequality, knowledge inequality and economic inequality in the digital era. Amidst the hustle and bustle of digital connectivity that should unite us, ironically, many people are actually feeling increasingly isolated and lonely. This phenomenon is known as "digital loneliness.", There are several key reasons why this is happening:

* Shallow and Meaningless Connections. Social media and digital platforms allow us to connect with hundreds or even thousands of people, but these relationships are often superficial. Interactions as simple as a "like" or a brief comment cannot replace the intimacy and depth of face-to-face interactions involving facial expressions, body language, and tone of voice.

* Unrealistic Social Comparison. We often see "best-case" snapshots of other people's lives on social media. They showcase happy moments, successes, and seemingly perfect lives. This can trigger feelings of inadequacy, envy, and low self-esteem, making us feel that our lives are not as good as others' and ultimately feel isolated.

* Dependence on Digital Validation. The culture of "likes" and online validation creates pressure to constantly perform and gain recognition. When we don't receive this validation, we can feel anxious and worthless, which ultimately exacerbates feelings of loneliness.

* Lack of Real Interaction. Being too focused on our phones or gadgets when we're with others, a phenomenon often called "phubbing," can cause us to miss out on valuable moments and real interactions. This can make the people closest to us feel distant, even though they're right there beside us.

How to Overcome It?

Overcoming loneliness in the digital age requires awareness and the effort to change our habits. Here are some practical steps you can take:

* Prioritize Face-to-Face Relationships. Schedule time to meet with family and friends in person. Invite them to eat, exercise, or just have a casual chat. Face-to-face interactions create much stronger and more authentic emotional bonds than digital communication.

* Manage Your Social Media Use. Set clear time limits for social media use. Try not to passively scroll, which has been shown to increase feelings of loneliness. Instead, use social media for more meaningful purposes, such as contacting old friends or joining groups that share similar interests.

* Join a Community or Group. Find a community or group with similar interests in your area, whether it's a book club, sports group, or hobby class. This is a great way to meet new people and build more meaningful relationships.

* Engage in Satisfying Activities. Volunteering or developing a new hobby can provide a sense of purpose and accomplishment. These activities not only distract from feelings of loneliness but also open up opportunities to meet people with similar values and interests.

* Focus on Quality, Not Quantity. Instead of trying to have hundreds of virtual "friends," focus on building a few truly deep and meaningful relationships. Intimate and supportive relationships are key to overcoming loneliness.

While technology offers many conveniences, true happiness and connection are found in real human relationships. By taking these steps, we can use technology as a tool, not a barrier, to building a richer and more fulfilling social life.

Common habits that successful people do in the morning

    Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "Common habits that successful people do in the morning", The main reason why I chose this topic is because many people don't do the habits that successful people do in the morning,  Many successful people have one thing in common: they utilize the mornings very effectively. This time is often a "golden window" when our energy levels and focus are still very high, uncontaminated by the distractions or stress of the day.

Here are some of the most productive morning habits, which could be the secret behind many people's success.

1. Wake Up Early

This is the foundation of all productive morning habits. Waking up early gives you free time to do important things without rushing. You don't have to feel pressured by time, which allows you to start the day calmly and organized. Many leaders and CEOs wake up at 4:00 or 5:00 a.m. to get some "quiet time" before the busy day begins.

2. Exercise or Move

Moving your body in the morning is a great way to wake up your brain and increase energy. Exercise triggers the release of endorphins, which can improve your mood and reduce stress. You don't have to run a marathon; just do 15-30 minutes of yoga, stretching, or a brisk walk around the block.

 3. Journaling or Meditation

This is a habit that focuses on mental health. Many successful people take time to reflect and clear their minds.

* Journaling: Writing down what you're grateful for or setting goals for the day can provide direction and increase gratitude.

* Meditation: Doing 10 minutes of meditation helps you focus, reduce anxiety, and start the day with a calm mind.

4. Set Daily Priorities

Instead of immediately checking email or social media, take time to plan your day. Determine your "top three priorities" that you need to accomplish that day. This ensures that you prioritize the most important tasks, not just the most urgent ones.

5. Avoid Screen Time

Many people reach for their phones as soon as they wake up. This habit can immediately trigger stress and lead to distractions. Avoid checking email, social media notifications, or the news for at least the first 30 minutes. Use that time to focus on yourself and your morning habits.

6. Eat a Nutritious Breakfast

Breakfast is your first "fuel" to start the day. Eating a balanced breakfast can improve focus and provide consistent energy throughout the day. Avoid foods high in sugar, which can cause your energy to crash quickly.

The key to these habits isn't to adopt them all at once. The secret is to choose one or two habits that resonate with you best and make them an integral part of your morning routine. With consistency, these habits will form a solid foundation for a productive day and, ultimately, success.

In addition to the points already mentioned, there are several other important habits that successful people often practice in the morning. These habits focus more on self-development and mental preparation for a productive day.

1. Learning or Listening to Something Inspirational

Successful people don't just start their day with physical activity, but also with mental stimulation. They use the quiet morning hours to consume useful content.

* Reading a book: Reading a book (non-fiction, biography, or self-development) for 15-20 minutes in the morning can enrich your knowledge and provide new ideas.

* Listening to a podcast or audiobook: While exercising or getting ready, many people listen to inspirational content, such as podcasts about leadership, business strategy, or success stories.

2. Connecting with a Big Purpose

Before starting their daily routine, successful people take time to remind themselves of "why" they do what they do.

* Reviewing their Vision and Mission: They might review their long-term vision or big goals. This helps them maintain focus and motivation, ensuring that every action they take that day aligns with their primary goal.

3. Doing the Most Difficult Task First (Eat the Frog)

This concept was popularized by author Brian Tracy. "Eat the frog" means completing the biggest, most difficult, or least enjoyable task early in the day.

* Why is this effective? Once you've conquered the most difficult task, the rest of the day will feel much easier. You start the day with a sense of accomplishment, which builds positive momentum for subsequent tasks. It also ensures that important tasks actually get done, rather than being put off until later in the day when your energy is already drained.

4. Avoiding Distractions and Multitasking

Mornings are a time for focus. Successful people tend to avoid the temptation to multitask.

* Focus on one task: Instead of replying to emails while making coffee, they complete one task completely before moving on to the next. This improves the quality of their work and reduces the chance of errors. * Distraction-free zone: They create a “work zone” in the morning that is free from notifications or interruptions, so they can fully concentrate.

How to increase self-confidence for shy people

   Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "How to increase self-confidence for shy people", The main reason why I chose this topic is because not many shy people are aware of their strengths, Another reason shy people don't act is because they perceive a new action as a dangerous threat to them, Building self-confidence for shy people is a journey that requires patience and practice. Shyness often stems from a fear of judgment or feelings of insecurity. However, with the right steps, you can gradually build stronger self-confidence.

Here are some ways you can improve your self-confidence:

1. Start Small (Baby Steps)

Don't immediately force yourself to do big things that make you uncomfortable. Start with small steps. For example:

* Practice making eye contact with people you know.

* Try smiling and greeting people you encounter every day, such as the security guard or cashier.

* Practice speaking in front of a mirror to get used to your own voice and facial expressions.

Every small success will build the foundation of your self-confidence. Celebrate every progress, no matter how small.

2. Focus on Your Strengths and Achievements

Shy people tend to focus more on their weaknesses and mistakes. Try to change this mindset. Make a list of the good things you have, whether they are skills, hobbies, or accomplishments.

 * Success Journal: Every night, write down 2-3 things you accomplished that day, no matter how small.

* Recognize Your Strengths: Are you a good listener? Conscientious? Creative? Recognize and appreciate your positive qualities.

3. Take Care of Your Appearance and Health

When you feel good physically, your thoughts tend to be more positive.

* Pay Attention to Your Appearance: Dress neatly and cleanly. This doesn't have to be expensive; the important thing is that you feel comfortable and confident.

* Healthy Lifestyle: Exercise regularly and eat nutritious foods. Physical activity can reduce stress and improve your mood.

4. Gradually Step Out of Your Comfort Zone

To grow, you must be willing to step out of your comfort zone. This doesn't mean you have to jump straight into situations that make you panic, but do it gradually.

* Join a Community: Join a club or class that aligns with your interests, such as a book club, yoga class, or volunteer group. This will allow you to meet new people with similar interests.

 * New Responsibilities: Take on new tasks or roles at work or school that require minimal social interaction. For example, volunteer to lead small discussions.

5. Don't Compare Yourself to Others

Everyone has a different journey and pace. Comparing yourself to others will only create insecurity. Focus on your own journey and personal growth. Remember, social media often only shows the best side of other people's lives.

Building self-confidence is a process. There will be days when you feel like you're progressing, and there will be days when you feel like you're regressing. Accept that this is part of the journey. Be kind to yourself and appreciate every effort you make.

In addition to the points mentioned above, there are several other important points that can help shy people build self-confidence. These are more related to your mindset and how you interact with the world around you.

1. Understand the Source of Your Shyness

Try to reflect and find out where your shyness stems from. Is it due to past experiences? A fear of rejection? Or perhaps you grew up in an environment that limited self-expression? Finding the root cause can help you realize that shyness is not part of your identity, but rather something that can be changed.

2. Practice Positive Thinking

Your thoughts are incredibly powerful. Shy people often have a critical and negative "inner voice."

* Replace "I can't" with "I will try."

* When you feel anxious, ask yourself: "What's the worst that could happen?" Often, the worst-case scenario you imagine isn't that bad.

* Start giving yourself positive affirmations every day. For example, "I am capable and worthy."

 3. Stop Overthinking

Overthinking can paralyze you. When you're in a social situation, shy people tend to analyze every move and word they say. Instead, try to be more present in the moment.

* Focus on others: Instead of thinking about what you should say, listen to what others are saying. Ask questions that show you're interested in their stories. This takes the focus off your own anxiety.

4. Learn Social Skills

Social skills aren't innate; they can be learned and practiced.

* Learn how to initiate conversations: Start with small things like complimenting something someone is wearing or commenting on the weather.

* Practice open body language: Stand up straight, maintain eye contact (without staring), and don't cross your arms. Confident body language can make you feel more confident.

5. Accept Your Imperfections

No one is perfect. You will make mistakes, say awkward things, and face rejection. This is a normal part of life. A confident person isn't someone who never fails, but someone who can bounce back and learn from their failures. Accepting that you're not perfect is a big step toward true self-confidence.

Remember, everyone has their own path and pace. The most important thing is to keep trying and never give up on yourself.

How Existentialist Thought Explains Humanity's Search for Meaning in Life

      Hi, today I want to share a topic about "How Existentialist Thought Explains Humanity's Search for Meaning in Life", The main reason why I chose this topic is because many people have lost their existential values, this is very dangerous for some people who want to live longer, To combat existential emptiness, humans must begin to limit their focus and start doing things they have always liked but often avoided. Existentialist thought explains that the search for meaning in human life is not something given or predetermined. Instead, the meaning of life is something that must be created by the individual themselves through their choices, actions, and responsibilities, For your information: Existentialism rejects the idea that there is a universal purpose in life or an innate essence that defines humans before their existence. Therefore, for existentialists, humans are born "empty" and must fill that void with their own meaning.

Key Concepts in Existentialism

1. Existence Precedes Essence

This is a core concept of existentialism popularized by Jean-Paul Sartre. This means that human existence comes before their essence. Unlike objects, whose essence (for example, the function of a knife) is predetermined before they are created, humans do not have a predetermined essence.  They are born without a predetermined purpose, and their task is to define themselves through their lives.

2. Absolute Freedom and Responsibility

Because humans do not have a predetermined essence, they have absolute freedom of choice. This freedom extends beyond small, everyday choices to the fundamental choices that shape who one is.

However, this freedom comes with a tremendous burden: responsibility. Every choice made, good or bad, is entirely the individual's responsibility. There is no longer a God, fate, or social norms to blame. This burden often triggers existential anxiety—a sense of fear and restlessness that arises from the realization of the inevitability of freedom and responsibility.

3. Absurdity and Rebellion

Existentialists like Albert Camus argued that life is absurd. This means there is a discrepancy between the human desire to find meaning and the silence of the universe, which offers no answers. However, this absurdity should not lead to despair. Instead, rebellion against it is a way to create meaning. Individuals must continue to search, act, and live life passionately, even though they know that, ultimately, none of it has any inherent meaning.

4. Authenticity and Inauthenticity

Living authentically means living in harmony with one's own choices and beliefs, rather than simply following the norms or expectations of others. This is a way to fully embrace freedom and responsibility. Conversely, living inauthentically or "bad faith" (mauvaise foi) occurs when a person deceives themselves, pretending they lack freedom or blaming external factors for their choices.

How Do Humans Seek Meaning in Life?

According to existentialism, humans seek meaning in life by:

* Creating personal values: Individuals must determine what is valuable to them, rather than adopting values from outside.

* Taking action: Meaning is not found in passive contemplation, but in concrete actions that shape the self and the world.

* Facing anxiety: Acknowledging and accepting the anxiety that comes with freedom is a crucial step in living authentically.

* Living life to the full: Even in the face of absurdity, humans must continue to live life with passion, enthusiasm, and commitment.

How to respond to unpredictable stress

   Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "How to respond to unpredictable stress", The reason I chose this topic is because many people experience stress to the point where they are trapped in worrying situations, To respond to stress effectively, you can try various approaches that involve lifestyle changes, relaxation techniques, and mindfulness. Here are some ways you can implement them:

1. Identify and Manage the Source of Stress

An important first step is to identify what is causing your stress. Is it work, relationship problems, finances, or something else? Once you know the source, you can find ways to reduce or cope with it. If the stress stems from something you can't change, focus on how you respond to the situation.

2. Practice Relaxation Techniques

Relaxation techniques can help calm your mind and body when stress strikes:

- Deep Breathing: Deep breathing exercises can calm the nervous system and reduce anxiety. Inhale deeply through your nose, hold it for a moment, and then exhale slowly through your mouth.

- Meditation: Meditation helps clear your mind and reduce stress. You can try a short meditation session daily for optimal results.

- Yoga: Yoga combines physical movement, breathing, and meditation, which can help reduce physical and mental tension.

 3. Maintain a Healthy Lifestyle

A healthy lifestyle plays an important role in managing stress:

- Adequate Sleep: Aim for 7-9 hours of sleep every night. Lack of sleep can exacerbate stress.

- Balanced Nutrition: Eat nutritious foods and avoid processed foods, excess sugar, and excessive caffeine.

- Regular Exercise: Physical activity releases endorphins, which can improve your mood and reduce stress.

4. Build Social Support

Talking with friends, family, or someone you trust can help relieve stress. Sharing your feelings and experiences can provide new perspectives and emotional support. Don't hesitate to seek professional help if your stress feels excessive or is interfering with your daily life.

5. Allocate Time for Yourself

Make time for activities you enjoy, such as reading, listening to music, or pursuing a hobby. This helps you recharge and reduces stress.

By combining these strategies, you can respond to stress more effectively and improve your quality of life.

The Causes of Increasing Stress

Stress is the body's natural response to challenges or demands. However, there are several factors that can exacerbate stress, especially in this modern era.

1. Complex Life Demands

* Financial demands: The ever-rising cost of living, the pressure to have a successful career, and debt can be significant sources of stress. We often feel like we have to work harder just to maintain our lifestyle.

* Social demands: Social media makes us constantly compare ourselves to others. We see the "best version" of other people's lives and feel left behind, which creates pressure to always look perfect.

* Time pressure: We live in a fast-paced world. Deadlines, busy schedules, and constant multitasking can leave us feeling overwhelmed and without enough time to breathe.

2. Uncertainty and Rapid Change

* Technological change: Rapid technological developments, such as artificial intelligence and automation, create uncertainty about the future of work.

* Global conditions: World events such as pandemics, climate change, or geopolitical conflicts can create deep concerns about security and stability.

 3. Lack of Boundaries

* Work infiltrates personal life: With smartphones and readily accessible email, the lines between work and personal life are blurred. We often feel like we must always be "available" and can't fully rest.

* Difficulty saying "no": Many of us feel pressured to always agree to the requests of others, whether from coworkers, friends, or family, which can lead to mental and physical overload.

How to Manage Stress

While stress is unavoidable, we can manage it so it doesn't escalate. Some steps you can take:

* Set boundaries: Learn to say "no" to unimportant things. Turn off work notifications after work hours.

* Focus on one thing: Instead of multitasking, try focusing on one task at a time to increase efficiency and reduce feelings of overwhelm.

* Get enough rest: Make sure you have time to relax and pursue hobbies you enjoy, such as reading, listening to music, or walking in nature.

 * Seek professional help: If stress feels overwhelming and is interfering with your daily life, don't hesitate to talk to a psychologist or counselor.

By understanding the root causes of stress, we can be more proactive in dealing with it and maintaining our mental health.

Increasing self-confidence by applying Albert Bandura's self-efficacy theory

  Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "Increasing self-confidence by applying Albert Bandura's self-efficacy theory",  The reason I chose this topic is because not many people feel confident even though they are used to doing something routinely,  building self-confidence is not enough by doing ordinary things, but rather focuses on a person's belief in their ability to succeed in a task or situation. Unlike general self-confidence, self-efficacy is more specific and action-oriented. According to Bandura, there are four main sources that influence a person's level of self-efficacy, and by understanding them, we can systematically increase our self-confidence.

1. Mastery Experiences

This is the most powerful and effective source of self-efficacy. When we successfully complete a task, our belief in our abilities increases. Conversely, repeated failures can weaken this belief.

How to Apply It:

* Start Small: Don't immediately aim for the big picture. Start with small, realistic tasks that you can accomplish. Each small success will build a strong foundation for your self-confidence.

* Celebrate Small Achievements: Every time you achieve a goal, no matter how small, give yourself recognition. This will strengthen the connection between effort and success.

* Analyze Failure: Instead of feeling crushed by failure, see it as a learning opportunity.  Understand what went wrong, correct your strategy, and try again. Bandura believed that people with high self-efficacy see failure as a lack of effort, not a lack of ability.

2. Vicarious Experiences

This is a way to increase self-efficacy by observing others succeed at a task. When we see someone similar to us succeed, we tend to believe we also have the same abilities.

How to Apply It:

* Find Relevant Role Models: Look for people—whether friends, mentors, or public figures—who are successful in the field you want to master. Make sure they have similar backgrounds or characteristics to you so you can relate.

* Learn from Success Stories: Listen to or read their stories. Pay attention to how they faced challenges and overcame obstacles. This will give you a mental "roadmap" for how to achieve your own goals.

* Avoid Destructive Comparisons: Focus on learning from the successes of others, rather than negative self-comparison, which can make you feel inferior.

 3. Social Persuasion

Social persuasion is verbal encouragement or motivation from a credible and trusted person. When someone we respect tells us we are capable, our self-confidence can increase.

How to Apply It:

* Surround Yourself with Positive Support: Spend time with people who support, encourage, and believe in your potential. Stay away from people who frequently belittle or make negative comments.

* Seek Constructive Feedback: When in doubt, seek advice or encouragement from a mentor or trusted friend. Words of encouragement from a credible source are far more effective than empty praise.

* Avoid Excessive Praise: Unrealistic praise can actually undermine self-efficacy. Ensure that the praise you receive or give is based on your actual efforts and abilities.

4. Physiological and Emotional States

Our physical and emotional states influence how we perceive our own abilities.  Feelings of anxiety, fatigue, or stress are often interpreted as signs of inadequacy, which can lower self-efficacy.

How to Apply Them:

* Manage Stress: Learn stress management techniques like meditation, breathing exercises, or exercise. Controlling your body's response to stress will help you feel more prepared to face challenges.

* Maintain Physical Health: Make sure you get enough rest, eat nutritious foods, and exercise regularly. A healthy body sends positive signals to your brain, contributing to feelings of capability and strength.

* Reinterpret Emotions: Instead of viewing anxiety as a sign of failure, reinterpret it as energy that can be used to tackle tasks. For example, nervousness before a presentation can be interpreted as "a signal that this is important and I'm ready to give my best."

By combining these four strategies, you'll not only boost your self-confidence but also build a solid foundation for growth and resilience in facing life's challenges.

How Does the Concept of Existentialism Help Us Find the Meaning of Life in the Midst of Uncertainty?

 

 

  Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "How Does the Concept of Existentialism Help Us Find the Meaning of Life in the Midst of Uncertainty?", the main reason why I chose this topic is because many people are experiencing an identity crisis in this modern era,  Indeed, finding the purpose of life is not easy,  but one can do it as long as they build a habit where Innovate their disciplined action and their commitment, just for information,  Existentialism was born amidst crisis, war, and the uncertainty of life, so it is very relevant to discuss. Here's the explanation:

🔎 Key Concepts of Existentialism

✅Existence precedes essence (Jean-Paul Sartre)

This means that humans are born without an absolute "innate destiny"; we ourselves create meaning through our choices and actions.

✅Freedom & Responsibility

Everyone is free to choose their own path, but this freedom comes with full responsibility for the consequences.

✅Anxiety (angst)

The uncertainty of life creates anxiety, but it is precisely from this anxiety that we can realize our freedom and potential.

✅Authenticity

Life is meaningful when we dare to be true to ourselves, rather than simply following social trends or external pressures.

✅Meaning in Limitation (Viktor Frankl, Logotherapy)

Even in suffering, humans can still find meaning—for example, through love, work, or our attitude toward circumstances.

🌱 How Does Existentialism Help You Find the Meaning of Life?

✅ Accepting uncertainty as part of life

Existentialism teaches that uncertainty is not something to be feared, but rather a space for growth.

✅ Finding meaning through conscious choice

Instead of waiting for external “life answers,” we create meaning through decisions that align with our values.

✅ Living authentically in the present

Rather than dwelling on future anxieties, existentialism encourages us to be fully present and honest with ourselves in the present moment.

✅ Transforming suffering into an opportunity for meaning

In difficult circumstances, we can ask: “What is the most humane attitude I can take in this situation?”

✨ Practical Example

When facing career uncertainty, instead of waiting for complete certainty, we can choose a path that aligns with our values, even if the risks are significant.

In complex relationships, we learn to take full responsibility for our choices—whether to stay, change, or let go.

In times of loss, we can find meaning by helping others who are also suffering.

 🔑 Conclusion

Existentialism doesn't provide "definitive answers," but rather provides a framework for thinking: that precisely in the midst of uncertainty, we have the freedom to create meaning, live authentically, and take responsibility for our choices.

What can we learn from the stoic philosophers about managing emotions in the modern era?

    Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "What Can We Learn from the Stoic Philosophers about Managing Emotions in the Modern Era?",  The main reason for choosing this topic is because not everyone is able to control their emotions when faced with something that makes them uncomfortable. In today's fast-paced and uncertain modern world, Stoic philosophy offers practical and relevant guidance for managing emotions. Contrary to the common misconception that Stoicism is about suppressing emotions or being emotionless, the teachings of philosophers like Seneca, Marcus Aurelius, and Epictetus actually teach intelligent ways to respond to the external world calmly and rationally.

Here are some key lessons from the Stoics about managing emotions that we can apply today:

1. The Dichotomy of Control

This is the most fundamental principle of Stoicism. The Stoics teach us to distinguish between the things we can control and those we cannot.

* What can we control? Our own thoughts, judgments, decisions, and actions.

* What can we not control? Everything outside of ourselves, such as the weather, the actions of others, or the outcome of an event.

Modern application: Many negative emotions, such as frustration or anger, arise from trying to control things that are beyond our control.  When stuck in traffic, getting angry won't get the traffic moving. Stoic philosophy teaches us to shift our focus from the traffic jam itself (which we can't control) to our response (which we can control)—for example, by listening to a podcast, taking deep breaths, or using the time for reflection.

2. Rational Evaluation (The Art of Judgment)

Stoics believe that negative emotions are not caused by the event itself, but by our judgment of it. As Epictetus said, "It's not the things that bother us, but the way we perceive them."

Modern application: When receiving harsh criticism at work, the hurt or anger isn't a result of the words, but rather our judgment that the criticism is an unfair personal attack. Stoicism encourages us to reexamine that judgment. Is the criticism valid? If so, use it as an opportunity for growth. If not, let it go and focus on your work.

3. Preparing for the Worst (Premeditatio Malorum)

This is the practice of imagining the worst-case scenario.  The purpose of this negative visualization is not to be pessimistic, but rather to mentally prepare and reduce the emotional impact if something bad actually happens.

Modern-day application: Imagine the scenario of losing your job or failing a major project. By visualizing this possibility, you become more mentally prepared. If it actually happens, the emotional shock will be less severe because you've anticipated it. Furthermore, you'll be more grateful for the good things you currently have.

4. Don't Depend on External Things

Stoicism teaches that true happiness (eudaimonia) doesn't come from wealth, social status, or the recognition of others—all things that can be lost at any time. True happiness comes from within, from our own virtues and good character.

Modern-day application: In the age of social media, many people feel anxious and envious because they compare themselves to others. Stoicism offers an antidote: instead of chasing likes or recognition, focus on developing your character—becoming a more just, wise, and courageous person. When your happiness doesn't depend on external validation, you'll be much calmer and more emotionally stable. 

Ultimately, Stoicism in the modern era is about choosing to be calm and resilient in the midst of chaos, not by ignoring emotions, but by managing them through wisdom and self-control.

Simple mindfulness techniques to reduce stress levels

     Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "Simple mindfulness techniques to reduce stress levels", The main reason why I chose the following topic is because many people feel stressed in their daily lives,  In the past, when our elders faced stress, they didn't have many choices, they just meditated and looked for a shady place, for your information that mindfulness techniques are essential for reducing stress levels because they directly address the root cause of stress which affect to the mind and body as respond to pressure. Here are some reasons why:

✅Stops the autopilot mind

When stressed, the brain often gets stuck in overthinking, replaying problems, or worrying about the future. Mindfulness trains us to return to the present moment, so our minds don't keep wandering.

✅Reduces emotional reactivity

Mindfulness helps us become aware of emotions without immediately reacting. This way, instead of becoming angry, panicking, or overly anxious, we can respond more calmly and in a controlled manner.

✅Calms the nervous system

Mindful breathing and mindfulness exercises stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system (rest and digest), which is the opposite of the fight-or-flight stress mode. As a result, the heart rate slows, muscles relax, and the body becomes calmer.

✅Improves clarity of thought

With a mind that is no longer "noisy," we can make clearer, more rational, and less rushed decisions. This reduces the feeling of stress when facing problems.

✅Building Acceptance

Stress often arises because we resist circumstances we cannot change. Mindfulness teaches acceptance, so that mental energy is not wasted fighting things beyond our control.

✅Long-Term Effects on the Brain

Neuroscientific studies show that mindfulness can strengthen the area of the brain associated with emotional regulation (the prefrontal cortex) and weaken activity in the amygdala (the stress response center).

✨ In short: mindfulness is like an "emergency brake" for an overly fast and panicked mind. It provides a pause, reduces physical tension, calms emotions, and makes stress more manageable.

Some simple mindfulness techniques you can practice to reduce stress:

1. 4-7-8 Breathing

This is a simple technique that can be done anywhere.

* Inhale through your nose for 4 seconds.

* Hold your breath for 7 seconds.

* Exhale through your mouth for 8 seconds.

Repeat this cycle 3-4 times. This technique helps calm the nervous system and relieve tension.

2. Body Scan

* Lie or sit comfortably.

* Close your eyes.

* Start focusing at your toes. Feel the sensations in each part of your body, from your toes, through your feet, calves, thighs, and up through your entire upper body.

* Notice any sensations that arise—coldness, warmth, itching, or tension—without judgment.

* Slowly shift your focus to the next part of your body until you reach your head.

This exercise helps you become more aware of your physical condition and release pent-up tension.

 3. The Five Senses (5-4-3-2-1)

This technique is especially effective when you're feeling overwhelmed or panicked.

* Name five things you can see around you.

* Name four things you can touch (e.g., the texture of your clothes, the surface of a table, the wind on your skin).

* Name three things you can hear.

* Name two things you can smell.

* Name one thing you can taste on your tongue (e.g., the aftertaste of your last drink).

This exercise brings your focus back to the present moment, taking your mind off stressful things.

How to make dreams come true realistically

   Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "how to make dreams come true realistically",  The main reason why I chose this topic is because many people want to make all their dreams come true in their own way,  However, if we look at it from the perspective of the laws of the universe, no human being can make something happen in the way they want except with God's law, Making every human's dream in a reality today needs a sustainable effort, even if the dream is not yet clearly visible, it requires a series of actions and a sustained shift in mindset. Here are some steps you can take:

Deep Visualization:

- Imagine in Detail: Take time each day to visualize your dream as if it were already a reality. Imagine the details: how you feel, what you see, hear, and taste. Engage all your senses.

- Create a Visualization Board: Collect images, words, and symbols that represent your dream and post them on a visualization board. Place it somewhere you'll see them often to remind and motivate yourself.

Set Specific and Measurable Goals:

- Break Down Big Dreams: Divide your big dream into smaller, more achievable goals. These goals should be specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART).

- Example: If your dream is to become a famous writer, smaller goals might be: write 500 words every day, complete one chapter every week, and submit your manuscript to a publisher within six months.

 Take Consistent Action:

- Take Small Steps Every Day: Consistency is key. Take at least one small action every day that moves you closer to your dream.

- Example: If your dream is to own your own business, small actions could include: conducting market research, creating a business plan, or contacting a potential mentor.

Change Your Mindset:

- Believe in Yourself: Convince yourself that you are capable of achieving your dream. Eliminate doubts and negative thoughts.

- Focus on Solutions: When facing challenges, don't focus on the problem, but focus on the solution. Find ways to overcome obstacles.

- Be Positive: Maintain a positive and optimistic attitude. Believe that everything will work out well in the end.

Seek Support:

- Build a Network: Find people who share similar dreams or have achieved what you want to achieve. Learn from their experiences and ask for support.

- Find a Mentor: A mentor can provide valuable guidance, advice, and support.

- Join a Community: Join a community or group that supports your dream.

 Celebrate Progress:

- Self-Praise: Every time you achieve a small goal, celebrate it. This will boost your motivation and make you feel closer to your dream.

- Reward: Give yourself a small reward as a token of appreciation for your hard work.

Adapt and Evaluate:

- Periodic Evaluation: Review your goals and strategies periodically. Are you still on track? Does anything need to be adjusted?

- Flexibility: Be flexible and open to change. Your dreams may change over time, and you will need to adapt accordingly.

In Indonesia, especially in East Java, values such as gotong royong (cooperation) and family support are very important. Building a dream often involves:

- Family Support: Getting support from family and relatives is crucial. Involve them in your dream and ask for their support.

- Community: Join a community or group that shares similar interests. This can provide moral and practical support.

- Spirituality: Relying on spiritual beliefs can provide strength and calm in facing challenges. 

Concrete Example

Dream: Opening your own cafe.

- Visualization: Imagine your cafe bustling with customers, the aroma of fragrant coffee, and a comfortable atmosphere.

Goals:

- Market research: Within 1 month.

- Business plan: Within 2 months.

- Finding a location: Within 3 months.

- Obtaining capital: Within 6 months.

Action: Every day, set aside time to learn about the cafe business, research new recipes, or contact coffee suppliers.

- Mindset: Convince yourself that you can create a successful cafe. Don't let doubts hold you back.

Conclusion

Making your dreams a reality requires visualization, goal setting, consistent action, a shift in mindset, support, celebrating progress, and adapting. By following these steps and staying focused on your dream, you can turn it into a reality.

Types of skills that are difficult to measure

      Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "Types of skills that are difficult to measure",  The reason I chose this topic is because many people are obsessed with various types of skills, but not many of them want to maximize their potential, Here are some examples of skills that are difficult to measure quantitatively, often referred to as soft skills:

- Creativity:

- Reasons Why It's Difficult to Measure: Creativity is subjective and variable. It's difficult to establish objective standards for measuring original ideas or innovative solutions.

- Examples: Generating new ideas for marketing campaigns or designing unconventional solutions to technical problems.

- Emotional Intelligence (EQ):

- Reasons Why It's Difficult to Measure: EQ involves the ability to understand and manage emotions, which are internal and difficult to assess directly. Although EQ tests exist, the results are often subjective.

- Examples: The ability to remain calm under pressure, empathize with coworkers, or resolve conflict constructively.

- Adaptability:

- Reasons Why It's Difficult to Measure: Adaptability refers to the response to change, which is difficult to predict and measure in a standardized way. The success of adaptation is highly context-dependent.

- Examples: Adapting to new software changes, organizational restructuring, or changing business strategies.

 - Communication Skills:

- Difficult to Measure: Effective communication involves multiple aspects, such as clarity, accuracy, and listening skills, which are difficult to assess with a single metric.

- Examples: Communicating ideas clearly in meetings, writing effective emails, or actively listening when interacting with customers.

- Teamwork:

- Difficult to Measure: Individual contributions within a team are often difficult to isolate. Measuring teamwork effectiveness involves subjective factors such as collaboration, support, and synergy.

- Examples: Collaborating with coworkers to complete projects, sharing knowledge and resources, or supporting struggling team members.

- Leadership:

- Difficult to Measure: Leadership involves the ability to motivate, inspire, and guide others, which is difficult to measure quantitatively. The impact of leadership is often seen in the long term.

- Examples: Providing clear direction to a team, providing constructive feedback, or inspiring team members to achieve a common goal.

- Critical Thinking:

- Difficult to Measure: Critical thinking involves analyzing, evaluating, and interpreting information, which is complex and subjective.

 - Examples: Evaluating data before making a decision, identifying underlying assumptions in an argument, or considering multiple points of view before reaching a conclusion.

- Work Ethic:

- Difficult to Measure: Work ethic encompasses values such as integrity, responsibility, and professionalism, which are difficult to assess objectively.

- Examples: Keeping promises, taking responsibility for mistakes, or maintaining the confidentiality of company information.

- Initiative:

- Difficult to Measure: Initiative involves the ability to act without being told and to seek proactive solutions, which is difficult to assess in a standardized manner.

- Examples: Identifying potential problems and taking action to prevent them, finding ways to improve work processes, or offering assistance to coworkers in need.

- Time Management:

- Difficult to Measure: While task completion time can be measured, effective time management involves subjective factors such as prioritization, focus, and the ability to avoid distractions.

- Examples: Creating a daily to-do list, prioritizing tasks based on urgency and importance, or avoiding procrastination.

Why Is This Skill Difficult to Measure?

 1. Subjectivity: Assessment often depends on individual perception and personal bias.

2. Context: These skills are highly dependent on the work situation and environment.

3. Lack of Standard Metrics: There is no universally agreed-upon measurement tool for objectively assessing these skills.

4. Behavioral Change: These skills often manifest in behaviors, which are difficult to monitor and measure consistently.

5. Interdependence: These skills are often interrelated and difficult to separate.

How to Assess Difficult-to-Measure Skills?

- 360-Degree Feedback: Gathering feedback from multiple sources (supervisors, peers, subordinates, clients) to gain a more comprehensive picture.

- Qualitative Performance Assessment: Using narrative descriptions and behavioral examples to assess skills in greater depth.

- Behavioral-Based Interviewing: Asking questions that delve into past experiences to assess how candidates have demonstrated specific skills in real-world situations.

 - Simulations and Case Studies: Using simulations or case studies to observe how candidates apply skills in practical situations.

- Self-Assessment: Asking individuals to reflect on their own strengths and weaknesses in specific skills.

Benefits of the journaling method in alleviating mental disorders

    Hi, today I want to share a topic about interesting topic, namely "Benefits of the journaling method in alleviating mental disorders" The main reason why I chose this topic is because there are many benefits of journals that are not practiced by the modern generation, If we pay attention, the human mind is in the spiritual realm, to express very complex thoughts, we need the journaling method, Journaling is the activity of regularly recording experiences, thoughts, and feelings. Here are the benefits of journaling:

Increased Self-Awareness:

- Understanding Emotions: Journaling helps you identify and understand emotions that may be hidden or overlooked.

- Recognizing Thought Patterns: By regularly recording your thoughts, you can recognize both positive and negative thought patterns.

- Discovering Values ​​and Purpose: Journaling can help you reflect on personal values ​​and life goals.

Reducing Stress and Anxiety:

- Releasing Emotions: Writing down your feelings can be an effective way to release pent-up emotions.

- Managing Stress: Journaling helps you identify sources of stress and develop coping strategies.

- Reducing Anxiety: By recording your worries, you can analyze them objectively and reduce excessive anxiety.

Improved Mental Health:

- Coping with Trauma: Journaling can be a useful tool for processing traumatic experiences and beginning the healing process.

- Reducing Symptoms of Depression: Writing about positive things and gratitude can improve your mood and reduce symptoms of depression.

 - Improve Sleep Quality: Journaling before bed can help calm the mind and improve sleep quality.

Increase Creativity and Productivity:

- Generate Ideas: Journaling can be a source of inspiration for generating creative ideas.

- Solve Problems: Writing down problems can help you see them from a different perspective and find innovative solutions.

- Improve Focus: Journaling can help you focus your thoughts and increase productivity.

- Improve Relationships with Yourself and Others:

- Increase Empathy: Journaling can help you understand the feelings and perspectives of others.

- Build Deeper Relationships: Writing about your relationships with others can help you strengthen emotional bonds.

- Increase Gratitude: Recording things you are grateful for can increase happiness and life satisfaction.

Tips for Getting Started Journaling:

- Set a Goal: Determine what you want to achieve with journaling.

- Choose a Format: Choose a journal format that suits your preferences (physical notebook, digital app, etc.).

- Schedule Time: Schedule a specific time each day or week to write in your journal.

 - Write Honestly: Write down whatever is on your mind without fear or worry.

- Don't Judge Yourself: Don't worry about grammar or writing style.

- Be Patient: It takes time to experience the benefits of journaling.

In Indonesia, journaling is increasingly popular as a tool for self-development and mental health. Many journaling communities and workshops can help you start and develop your journaling practice.

How to deal with the pressure of urgent desires

  Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "How to deal with the pressure of urgent desires", The main reason why I chose this topic is because many people are often tempted by non-urgent cravings, some of them, there are many people who try to control themselves when the non of urgent desires comes by putting their money to the safe account, according to some observers, people are unable to control their non urgent cravings because they are used to feeling comfortable in places that do not strengthen their mental state and they lack of money management acumen, here are some strategies to help you manage and avoid non-urgent cravings.

Understand Your Triggers

The first step is to identify what triggers the craving. Triggers can be social media ads, discount offers, or simply boredom. Once you know your triggers, it's easier to avoid them. For example, if you're often tempted by ads while browsing social media, try reducing your time on those platforms or turning off shopping notifications.

Create a Wish List

Whenever you think about buying something, don't buy it right away. Instead, write it down on your wish list. Wait 24 or 48 hours before making a decision. Often, the urge will fade over time, and you'll realize you don't really need it.

Delay Decisions

Delay non-urgent purchases. Give yourself time to think. Ask yourself these questions: "Do I really need this?", "Will this add value to my life?", and "Do I already have something similar?". Delaying decisions will help you make more rational choices.

 Distract Yourself

When an urge arises, immediately divert your attention to something else. Engage in an activity you enjoy, such as reading a book, exercising, or meeting a friend. Diverting your focus will help reduce the urge to buy non-urgent items.

Evaluate Long-Term Value

Before purchasing, consider the long-term value of the item. Will it provide lasting happiness or benefits, or just a momentary pleasure? Understanding the difference between needs and wants can help you avoid unnecessary spending.

By consistently applying these tips, you will find it easier to control your desires and make wiser decisions.

It's natural to have wild desires from a young age, as youth is full of energy, curiosity, and strong drives. However, if left unchecked, they can lead a person in a self-defeating direction. There are several practical ways to "curb" these urges without killing your spirit:

1. Recognize the source of the desire

Ask yourself: "Is this a real need or just a momentary desire?".

By distinguishing between needs and wants, you can be more selective.

2. Practice self-control gradually

Don't reject all desires immediately, as this can be frustrating.

Start by postponing: "I want this, but I'll wait." Over time, your brain will get used to the fact that desires don't have to be fulfilled immediately.

3. Fill your time with meaningful activities

Exercise, learning a new skill, writing, or social activities can channel energy.

Wild desires often arise when the mind is empty.

4. Set clear boundaries (self-boundaries)

For example: "I won't open certain apps after 10 p.m.."

 These small boundaries reduce the opportunity for wild desires to develop.

5. Get closer to spiritual values

Remember that desires cannot be eradicated, but they can be directed.

Prayer, dhikr, or reading holy books help calm the heart and provide a long-term perspective.

6. Find supportive friends

The environment is very influential. Friends who have a clear direction in life can instill positive enthusiasm.

7. Use a "wish journal"

Write down all your desires every day.

After a week, evaluate: which ones are truly important, and which ones were simply spurred on by fleeting emotions.

Not everyone has the right to choose for an option

  Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "Not everyone has the right to choose for an option", the reason I chose this topic is because many people are frustrated because they don't have the opportunity to choose, They think that living in this world has the freedom to choose, but it turns out it is not as they imagined, A person doesn't always have a choice due to various factors that influence their life. Essentially, the freedom to choose is influenced by four main factors: internal, external, psychological, and philosophical.

Internal Factors

Internal factors are conditions that originate within oneself. For example, someone experiencing severe depression may feel they have no choice or lack the energy to make a decision. They feel trapped, and their ability to see or pursue other options is limited. This is not because they don't want to, but because their mental state is limiting them.

External Factors

External factors are conditions beyond a person's control. These could include poverty, political instability, or social pressure.

* Poverty: A person living in poverty may be forced to take a low-paying job, even if they dislike it, just to survive. Options for pursuing a better career, education, or hobbies become limited because all energy and time must be focused on survival.

* Social Pressure: In some cultures or families, a person may feel forced to follow a certain path, such as marriage or work in a certain field, because of strong expectations from family or society. Going against these expectations can result in social exclusion or sanctions.

 * System Limitations: Another example is in emergency situations, such as natural disasters or war. People are faced with very limited choices: evacuate or stay, both of which may carry high risks.

Psychological Factors

Psychologically, some people experience "decision fatigue." Our brains have a limited capacity to make decisions in a day. When faced with too many choices, or very difficult choices, we can become overwhelmed and end up feeling "choiceless," or we give in to the easiest option, even if it's not the best.

Philosophical Factors

Philosophically, views on free will vary widely. Determinism holds that all events, including human choices, are predetermined by predetermined causes. According to this view, free will is an illusion. We feel like we're making decisions, when in fact, we're simply following a path predetermined by biological, environmental, and genetic factors.

In contrast, libertarianism believes that humans have true free will and can make choices that are not fully determined.

So, when someone feels like they have no choice, it could be a combination of many things. Sometimes, there simply isn't an ideal choice.  Sometimes, external or internal constraints are so powerful that they affect our ability to choose.

All of these factors demonstrate that freedom of choice is not something everyone possesses in equal measure. The lives we live are the result of a complex interaction between the choices we make and the constraints we face.

Remember one thing, a person can be considered worthy of making a choice because of several underlying factors:

Self-Awareness

They know what they are facing, the consequences of their choices, and what they truly need, not just a momentary desire.

Ability to Take Responsibility

Choices always have consequences. People who can accept the results of their choices—both good and bad—are more worthy of making choices than those who simply seek results without responsibility.

Maturity (Emotional & Intellectual)

A mature person will consider all aspects, not rush, and not be driven solely by emotion.

Freedom from Pressure

Being worthy of making choices means that the choice is truly authentic, not merely following the crowd, being forced, or being manipulated by others.

Values & Ethics

People with values (e.g., not harming others, respecting justice, protecting oneself from evil) will make healthier choices.

Readiness to Face Risk

Every choice carries a risk. Those who are worthy of making choices are those who are ready to accept risks, not those who simply hope for a perfect outcome. 

In summary: the right to choose arises when a person is aware, free, and ready to take responsibility for the consequences.

The difference between tawakal and despair

   Hi, today I want to share an interesting topic, namely "the difference between tawakal and despair",  The main reason why I chose this topic is because many people feel helpless in facing the crisis in various circles,  Many people do not know how to survive in a crisis, in various religions many religious leaders teach how to put their trust in God, Tawakal in Islam has a very deep meaning and is one of the pillars of faith. Etymologically, the word "tawakal" comes from Arabic which means to surrender, represent or surrender completely to Allah' s destiny.

 However, the meaning of tawakal in Islam is not just surrender or waiting for a miracle without effort. Tawakal is an attitude of heart that includes two main things:

  * Try and make serious efforts. This is an absolute first step. A Muslim who relies on trust must use all his abilities, thoughts and energy to achieve goals or face problems. Rasulullah SAW said: "Tie your camel, then put your trust in Allah." This hadith shows that effort (tying the camel) must be done first before surrendering to Allah (tawakal).

  * Surrender the final result completely to Allah (God's name in Islam). After all maximum efforts have been made, a Muslim must let go of anxiety and worry about the results. He must believe with full confidence that whatever Allah has ordained is the best for him, because Allah is All-Knowing and All-Wise.

 Thus, tawakkal is a combination of hard work and sincere surrender to Allah. It is a work of the heart, where one believes that only Allah has absolute control over all things, while our efforts are merely a means or means commanded by Him.

Characteristics of someone who has tawakkal:

* Not easily discouraged: They know that failure is part of Allah's destiny and may have wisdom behind it.

* Their life is more peaceful: They are not haunted by excessive worry because they believe that their sustenance and fate have been determined by Allah.

* Optimistic and positive-minded: They always see everything with a positive perspective, believing that Allah will provide the best.

* Not arrogant: They realize that their success is not solely due to their own efforts, but rather due to Allah's help and grace.

In short, tawakkal is a strong belief that Allah will provide for all the needs of His servants who submit after doing their best. As Allah says in the Qur'an, At-Talaq verse 3:

"And whoever places his trust in Allah, He will suffice him."

In Islam and from a psychological perspective, humans should not despair because:

1. From a Religious Perspective

Allah forbids despairing of His mercy.

In the Quran:

"Do not despair of Allah's mercy. Indeed, no one despairs of Allah's mercy except the disbelievers." (Surah Yusuf: 87).

Despair means not believing that Allah is Almighty to change the situation, even though Allah says that with every difficulty there is ease (Surah Al-Insyirah: 5-6).

Despair can cause someone to abandon prayer, worship, and endeavor, even though these are actually the doors to help.

2. From a Psychological Perspective

Despair causes the brain to focus only on problems, not solutions. This triggers stress, depression, and feelings of helplessness.

Hope is the energy that keeps people moving and searching for solutions. Without hope, motivation is lost.

Many successful people begin with repeated failures, but they never give up.

 3. From the Perspective of Life

Life is a cycle: today is difficult, tomorrow may be easy.

Humans don't know God's plan; today's problems may be the path to greater goodness in the future.

By not giving up, humans open up opportunities to learn, grow, and discover a deeper meaning in life.

👉 So, not giving up is a form of faith, mental health, and a life strategy.